"The World I Know" by Collective Soul

As you may be aware (and I hope you are), today is Election Day in the United States. Today may well prove to be the most important election in our lifetime. I have a sinking worry that it might be the last truly free and fair election for the United States, too. This is not just doom-saying, my concerns are based on observation. I try not to watch the news, because it's bad for my mental health (I say that as a recovering political junkie), but I do try to watch the highlights in order to keep informed. After watching snippets of the January 6th testimony that has occurred so far, I worry that people don't understand how close we came to losing democracy that day. How close we are to losing democracy pending the results of today's election. A quote from "Star Wars" comes to mind: "So this is how liberty dies...with thundering applause."

Living in a "battleground" state - Arizona - I get a front row seat to the civil conflict brewing here in America. If you haven't noticed, Arizona has been the star of this election cycle, and not just for its role in upholding democracy on January 6th after the ridiculous fraudit nonsense. Our ballot is filled with a cast of characters you can only find in Arizona. We have Kari Lake, a former news broadcaster who, with her crazy eyes, tells everyone that the 2020 election was rigged and spouts off conservative talking points, which MAGA Republicans eat up, despite her liberal past (very similar to Donald Trump). I honestly hope she's lying, because the prospective of her serving as Governor with those views is genuinely terrifying. Then we have Blake Masters, a finance bro hand-picked by one of the richest people in America, who uses his family to mask his incel-level creepiness. And then there's Mark Finchem, an anti-government extremist who has used his platform to spread anti-Semitic sentiment. He's arguably the most dangerous candidate because, if he wins Secretary of State, he will have control over the outcome of future Arizona elections. It's not that there wasn't good, honorable Republican candidates running this year - there was. But these are the candidates who won the primaries. And I think that says something about who we are.

Has our conscience shown?

Has the sweet breeze blown?

Has all the kindness gone?

Hope still lingers on

I drink myself of new found pity

Sitting alone in New York City

And I don't know why

I don't particularly like the term "battleground state", mostly because there are some people who are taking that phrase a little bit too seriously. If you've been watching the news, you may have heard about "poll watchers" in Maricopa county. Masked individuals sitting in the bed of their pickups with an AK-47 (or some other gun/guns), watching everyone who goes to drop off their mail-in ballots. And almost everyone in the state has a fucking mail-in ballot. These men are cowards. Seriously?! Are you going to shoot a little old lady in front of a polling center? It's voter intimidation...and it's only being done by one-side - the authoritarian side. Full disclosure: I wouldn't kill anyone for Mark Kelly. But I also don't think he would ask me to, which should be a credit to him. Unfortunately, I think we've conflated strength with violence for so long, I'm not sure people can tell the difference. And the saddest thing about this election is I'm kind of worried what will happen if the Republicans don't win. When people believe a free and fair election is a "Heads I Win - Tails You Lose" game, any outcome outside of that could unleash a wave of chaos.

There is a strong current of dehumanization in Republican ads this cycle and there's an instinct to fight fire with fire. I'm trying not to do that, not even in my head, because I know that my day-to-day concerns aren't too different from a Republican woman. I'm worried about how much it costs to buy groceries each week, because it seems to still be going up in spite of the Fed's "measures." I'm worried whether my child is safe at school, because every other week there's a news story about a pedophile teacher or a school shooting. I'm worried they're not getting a good education that prepares them for life. I'm concerned about the recent spate of women killing their babies or neglecting them to death, which makes me weary of forced motherhood (not all women should be mothers). And I have this sinking feeling that - for all this talk of self-care and resolving ancestral trauma - we're just perpetuating a cycle of suffering that the younger generations will have to untangle. If there are younger generations, of course, because the planet may well be unlivable in 50 years. There's enough fear and problems in the world, I'd actually just like to see one implementable solution. 

Are we listening

To hymns of offering?

Have we eyes to see

That love is gathering?

All the words that I've been reading

Have now started the act of bleeding

Into one, into one

I was listening to Jessica Dore's November offering last week and the following sentence stuck out to me: Your silence will not protect you. And, yes, she was talking about sharing her opinions and beliefs, both political and not. A lot of creators on social media try to stay in this neutral place, where they don't offend anyone and, thus, don't lose followers. In the past year, Dore's lost a lot of followers, in part because she has chosen to be more outspoken (with such an eventful year, how can you not be?). She is trying to frame it to focus not on who she is losing, but who she is aligning with. This is part of embracing authenticity and honoring your truth. Not everyone can (or will want to) accompany you on your journey.

So I walk up on high

And I step to the edge

To see my world below

And I laugh at myself

While the tears roll down

'Cause it's the world I know

Oh it's the world I know

Let's talk a little bit about today's astrology. There's a total lunar eclipse in Taurus, conjunct Uranus and opposite Mercury and Venus. In addition to that, there's a Mercury Cazimi occurring today and, it goes without saying, but both Mercury and the Sun will be going through their oppositions to Uranus. Finally, the eclipse is activating the Saturn-Uranus square that we were experiencing throughout 2021. Although it's loosening, it's still within a three degree orb. Luckily, it's the last time that aspect will be activated, as Saturn will be entering Pisces in 2023, so the dust will settle once the aspect clears. As you can see, very chaotic energy. Not really a great day for an election in any country, but especially the United States. We're still in our Pluto Return, we have a Mars Retrograde in Gemini (we have natal Mars in Gemini), and everything happening now is setting the stage for our Uranus Return (we have natal Uranus in Gemini) that will kick off in unofficially 2025. This astrology portends a lot of power struggles, especially against authorities, a lot of fighting and arguing with Mars in the mix, and revolutionary ideas. I've been hearing about this eclipse for months on various astrology podcasts - Beware, Beware, the 8th of November! Well, it's here. What matters most is how you handle the energy. Maintain your calm and stability, like a Taurus. I haven't been handling it that well but we're almost done with eclipse season. And it's not all bad - someone may have woken up nearly $2 billion richer. It might've been you. It might've even been me. 

I chose "The World I Know" because it seemed fitting for a day like today. It's hard watching what's happening to the country and it's easy to feel powerless. In fact, that's what the video features - a man going about his day in New York City (the video is in blue tones, so you know he's sad), being confronted with homelessness, poverty, and despair throughout his commute. At some point, he decides the best solution would be to jump from the top of a building. But I guess he has a realization when a bird lands on his arm and instead of committing suicide, he tosses his money on the people below. This is obviously when people carried around massive quantities of cash, even in New York. I know....super crazy times. That being said, most people don't usually kill themselves over the news, but it can be a trigger. I can easily understand how someone who is going through something on a personal level might read something that triggers an emotional response that leads to them ending their life. And I'd be lying if I said there wasn't some of that energy floating around today, too. Take care of yourself. And if you're able to, go vote.

"The World I Know" Video

"Moondance" by Van Morisson

Tonight is the Full (Strawberry) Moon in Sagittarius and earlier today, we experienced a penumbral lunar eclipse at 15° Sagittarius. At approximately 12:12pm Pacific Time, give or take a few minutes. To understand what that means, before we get into the astrology of it all, we have to go back to some basic astronomy. The umbra is another name for the Earth's shadow and when the umbra falls directly over the moon (causing it to glow red), that's an umbral (or total) eclipse. A penumbral eclipse happens when the umbra only partially covers the moon - it's still an eclipse but it's a partial one. The United States wouldn't have really seen it because it occurred during our daylight hours, but people in India and other parts of the Middle East probably got a lovely surprise in their night sky. Now, there's also some basic rules that Full Moons and eclipses follow in astrology. In order for a Full Moon to be considered "full," the sun and the moon have to be in opposing signs (like Gemini and Sagittarius) at the exact same degree. Furthermore, in order for an eclipse to happen, the Full Moon has to be taking place in close proximity to the lunar nodes (I'll explain that later). The closer the moon falls to the nodal axis, the closer to a total eclipse it gets. The North Node recently moved into Gemini, with the South Node in Sagittarius, and they are both sitting at 29° of their respective signs.

And I'm trying to please to the calling

Of your heart-strings that play soft and low

And all the night's magic seems to whisper and hush

And all the soft moonlight seems to shine in your blush

For fun and profit (jk...not really profit), I've been studying my own natal chart to understand better astrological events and tracking their effect on my life and the things happening in current events. If we're just taking into account the shit in my natal chart, this Full Moon eclipse in Sagittarius is an important one for me. It is almost directly conjunct my Ascendant-Descendant axis (where my 1st and 7th Houses begin) and exactly conjunct my natal Saturn. Add the fact that Venus Retrograde is also conjunct my natal Ascendant, it's just a whole party. This eclipse season (because we have two more coming up) actually looks like it's designed specifically to my specifications. The solar eclipse, on 21 June, is at 0° Cancer, which will be exactly conjunct my natal Venus (also in the 1st House). Then, the final eclipse on 5 July (yep, the day before my birthday) at 13° Capricorn will be opposite my natal Sun and Mercury and conjunct my natal Neptune. And, yet again, like the one in January, it will be falling in my 8th House. What all that could mean personally, I'm only starting to unpack. Eclipse energy is hard to predict. But I know eclipses always bring change - especially when we're starting a transition to a new nodal axis.

I was reading my old journal again and I've found a few gems. For instance, this sparkling thought from New Year's Day 2012: "Oh, who the fuck am I kidding? I'll never be 'normal' or even 'average.' I'm not meant to fit in and I don't really want to." Whoo, child. I always felt I was too big for my body. But 25-year-old me was right - I don't know how to play it small. Stars are meant to shine, right? I'm sure I've written that trite-but-true-ism somewhere in that journal, too. A lot of my hopes in dreams from 8 years ago still stand, too. I want to be a writer - that hasn't changed since I was a little girl. And for some reason, I wanted to live on a farm. Sure, that dream has evolved quite a bit - it's a lavender farm now, with a Bed & Breakfast where I host Writer's Retreats and spirituality workshops - and, someday, I might actually own and run this mythical farm. But, for now, it's still a pleasant day dream to have from time to time. When I look back on exactly this time in 2012, I actually wrote it down - I was having an existentialist crisis....and nobody seemed to notice (she lamented bitterly in her online blog). Between May and July of 2012, I only wrote two posts on this blog and I didn't write much more than that in the journal. I can always tell how depressed I must be when my writing decreases - I just don't feel like it any more. Because what's the point? Even when I have good ideas, I don't have the courage or confidence to execute them. However, in the last two years, I averaged one post every three days. That's pretty amazing and I'm kind of proud of myself, because I can see the change in my writing. And my mindset.

There and then all my dreams will come true, dear

There and then I will make you my own

And every time I touch you, you just tremble inside

And I know how much you want me that you can't hide

Anyway, enough about me, let's talk about what this penumbral Lunar Eclipse in Sagittarius means for the rest of you poor schlubs. As I mentioned, we're moving out of the Cancer-Capricorn axis (Family-Career dichotomy, or Emotional vs Financial Security) and moving into the Gemini-Sagittarius axis (Knowledge-Wisdom dichotomy, or Details vs Big Picture). The important thing to remember about the North Node (Ketu) and South Node (Rahu) is you're aiming for balance. Evolutionary astrologists say that one's natal North Node is indicative of their Destiny and the South Node is indicative of Past Lives. However, going to far in either direction causes problems - you have to balance the lessons and natural skills/talents of your South Node with who your North Node indicates will bring about the most growth. For example, I am naturally artistic, intellectual, friendly and (dare I say it) charming - all traits of a Libra South Node - and those things help to balance the bossy, assertive, and brave (stupid) aspects of my Aries North Node. Too far in either direction and I'm either a doormat (Libra) or an asshole (Aries). And I'm not ashamed to say I've been both at various times in my life. Sometimes in the same day. 

Can I just have one more moondance with you, my love

Can I just make some more romance with you, my love

This Full Moon is shining light on the Sagittarius end of the axis, which calls us to examine our long held beliefs and philosophies. Not just our societal beliefs, but the ones we hold about ourselves. Beliefs about our unworthiness, our flaws, and the things we believe hold us back in life. This eclipse is giving us an opportunity to review those things and make the hard change, if it's needed. That's where Gemini comes into the picture. Gemini is all about embracing the polarities and combining them into a unified whole. You can make a mistake AND still be competent at your job. You can be rejected by someone you love AND still be lovable. Being ruled by Mercury, Gemini is there to help us find new and innovative to solve our problems. Where Sagittarius sees only one Truth, Gemini sees a myriad of Possibilities. Is that thing you want really impossible for you to have? Or are you just afraid to take a chance? That's what Gemini asks us - to take chances, to make mistakes, to make the hard choice. Gemini is also about Communication and with the North Node moving through this sign, it's giving us the ability and courage to put our desires and goals and ideas into words. Never underestimate the power of putting what you want into words, of writing down your goals. There's power in records, as you've seen from my trip down memory lane. The development of language is the only reason we have a history and writing will always be the greatest invention in human civilization. It's what enabled us to get this far. That's the lesson the Gemini-Sagittarius nodal axis teaches us - it's the details that ultimately build the big picture. In order to truly understand something, you need to take in as much information as you can.

This is a song I remember fondly from my childhood. It reminds me of long road trips with my dad, listening to Van Morrison (among other artists) through the night while my sisters and my mom slept. It was the only moon-related song I could think of off the top of my head, without going searching. I'm pretty sure this song about Van Morrison trying to get laid, though. "Moondance" very well could be a euphemism for sex. Sorry if that ruins it for you.

"Moondance" Video