"You and Me" by Lifehouse

It's a New Moon (in Aquarius, FYI, not that you asked) and it's also Chinese New Year. It's supposed to be a powerful time for manifesting, not just for the next month but for the whole year. Especially since the first New Moon of the year was all about releasing things that may have been holding you down (because of the eclipse), we're getting a fresh start in February. Thus, I thought it best if I started off this month with a real love song, not one that's bitter or angry. You know....just in case there is something to this whole manifestation thing, I don't want to invite in heartbreak. I've had enough of that, thank you very much, Universe.

Okay, so if we're not pulling in sadness or resentment, what do we want to pull in? Well, as I mentioned in my post for "High Hopes," it's all about being specific. I'm starting to realize that, when we're looking for love, we're not very specific. Honestly, we like the electricity in the beginning and then afterwards, it's just worrying whether or not they're going to stay. Regardless of whether it's for the highest good of everyone involved (and sometimes it's not....I know that's an uncomfortable truth). When I say specific, it's not about wanting a particular person. In "You've Got Mail," when Kate is breaking up with her fiance because he fell in love with another woman, he asks if she'll be okay, if she has someone else in mind. And she's says, "No....but there's the idea of someone else." And maybe some people think that it's unrealistic that she'd be okay with her long-time boyfriend leaving her for someone else, but I don't think so. Maybe deep down, she knew she was settling just because her current situation made logical sense from the outside. And the Universe intervened. I don't know why that particular scene popped into my head right now - this ramble just became a bit too pensive just now and I was trying to keep it light-hearted. Anyway, I think that's where a lot of people get stuck. And instead of getting unstuck, they just forget about what they wanted in the first place.

Alright, back on topic. What do I want to manifest for February? Well, I've always wanted my life to be romantic. Like movie romantic. The Husband used to say I had unrealistic expectations about this sort of stuff. Maybe that's true. But surprise flowers once in a while would be nice. I'm partial to white roses with red edges. Or oleander, which is my actual favorite flower. A bit unconventional, I know - it smells and looks pretty but all that beauty is secretly dangerous. What else? I'd like a few love letters. I'm the only one who ever writes them, so it'd be nice to get a few back. I've always wanted someone to write a poem for me - or make any art, really. Mr. Nice Guy bought me a stapler once and gave me a card that said "You're My Favorite." It was sweet, in a way, but I also kind of wanted to slap him. If I could avoid the "hopelessly practical" type, I would. Slow dancing in the park under a full moon....okay, now I'm just being ridiculous. Oh well....maybe I'm not the fairytale princess type, which means I'm going have to do these things by myself (and drag The Husband kicking and screaming, if I have to....though I'd rather not).

Why are the things that I want to say

Just aren't coming out right?

I'm tripping on words

You got my head spinning

I don't know where to go from here

'Cause it's you and me

And all of the people people with nothing to do

Nothing to prove

And it's you and me

And all other people

And I don't know why

I can't keep my eyes off of you

"You and Me" is one of my favorite love songs. So....in his head, the singer has separated humanity into two groups - him and the person he loves, and then all other people. And he doesn't even know what to do with this information! He can't even string the right words together, he can barely even think sometimes. Also, I would also like to note that I don't think this song was written in the infatuation stage, where you're all high on life. Nope, it's after you've done all that "getting to know you" crap and you still like being around the other person most of the time. And, even though some of the mystery is gone, you're still kind of in awe of the other person. Strange, I know. Most people turn into assholes once you really get to know them. Or they become boring and predictable. Or, worst of all, they turn into boring, predictable assholes.

Let's talk about the video, because - true to form - I do really love the video for this song. So everyone knows the Romantic Comedy ending - the girl, heartbroken after whatever betrayal the guy has done, decides she needs a change. Usually this change is getting back with her old boyfriend or leaving the country or changing jobs (or quitting prostitution....can I get a holla for "Pretty Woman"?). And - in an incredibly inconvenient twist - this is exactly the moment that the guy decides that he doesn't want to live without her. Thus, the Grand Romantic Gesture is born! Prince Charming pulls his head out of his ass, gets on his motorcycle, and races to stop her from going to....a job interview in DC? Couldn't he just have given her a phone call? It doesn't matter. She was stuck on the Brooklyn Bridge, anyway, so what else was she gonna do? Besides, smack dab in the middle of morning traffic is the perfect place to make out. I'm serious. They've done studies. Some version of that happens in the music video for "You and Me." Girl is headed out of town on the first train (Train? Where the fuck do these people live?!) outta town. Boy, finally realizing that she's his missing piece or something, is racing around the train station, trying to find her....preferably before her train leaves. The thing is....at the end of the video, he shows that he bought a train ticket to go with her. Clearly, he had her itinerary, so why was he freaking out? Boys are stupid.

I think I've ranted your earholes off enough for one night. Please enjoy the beautifully cheesy and almost disgustingly romantic musical stylings of Lifehouse. Video below. Happy Monday!

"You and Me" Video

"Everything" by Lifehouse

I've been thinking about Lily Potter and Severus Snape. Because that's what I do. I think deeply about Harry Potter stuff and then rant about it. Sometimes my thoughts and insights are clever, but usually they're just overwhelmingly intense considering that it's fiction. I've been thinking about the book and its characters even more since I began listening to the "Harry Potter & the Sacred Text" podcast - a fantastic listen and I would highly recommend it to any HP fans out there. Listening to Vanessa and Casper is comforting to me and usually, their conversations get me thinking philosophically about how the themes affect my own life. About how my own struggles are reflected in the lives of the characters. For example, the loneliness and isolation Harry felt at the Dursley's and the peace and belonging he felt when he was at Hogwarts, that's similar to how I felt my first day at college. It felt like the first night at school was the best night's sleep I had gotten in my whole life. Because I felt free. I felt safe. And I don't think I realized until I was a couple years older that this wasn't normal, that maybe my childhood wasn't normal.

There's a lot of parallels between characters as well. We recognize the obvious parallels between Harry and Voldemort, but it's not as obvious to see the parallel between Harry and Snape. Both of them grew up in homes where they felt unwanted and unloved. Unfortunately for Snape, he wasn't able to see Hogwarts as a refuge, the way Harry did. When he came to Hogwarts, he was bullied and teased. By Gryffindors, of all people, those who would naturally feel compelled to protect the underdogs and the outcasts. He had Lily, but she wasn't enough. She should've been, though - her friendship should've been enough. He was so mired down by all the pain he felt, that he couldn't see that she was reaching out to him. In fact, she tried to be there for him for six years, until he essentially called her a racial slur and she said - finally - I'm done....I'm done trying. He was consumed by darkness and all she wanted was to be his light. But Snape realized that too late. He lost everything and he had to live with that loss for the rest of his life. I was reading this chat transcript with JK Rowling where she said if Snape had just let Lily in and let go of his obsession with the darkness, she would have eventually grown to love him romantically. There are doubters, of course, but I personally believe this is true. You don't try to reach out to someone who is always pushing you away unless you love them in some capacity. However, if you push someone away long enough, eventually they'll get tired and let you alone, even if that's not what you really want.

Flirting with the idea of getting something
like this as a tattoo...

If I were Snape, seeing Harry every day would be extremely painful, because Harry is emblematic of everything he ruined. It was his selfishness - his feeling that he didn't deserve her kindness - that pushed Lily away, his obsession with the Dark Arts that led him to Voldemort, his eagerness to feel accepted that he let a sociopath use him to get the information that would ultimately be used to murder the love of his life. It's important that Harry has Lily's eyes because - I don't know - eyes are the window to the soul or some shit and when Snape was looking into Harry's eyes, it might've been like he was looking into Lily's soul. And it's unnerving looking into someone's soul. What if they're staring right back?

While I was thinking of Lily and Snape, "Everything" by Lifehouse came to mind. I love this song. Another one of those songs I consider one of the most romantic ever. Again, it's a simple song, not too many lyrics but even though there isn't that many words, every single word is meaningful. And then mid-way through, the music comes crashing down on you and you feel every note.

Find me here, and speak to me

I want to feel you, I need to hear you

You are the light that's leading me to the place

Where I find peace again

You are the strength that keeps me walking

You are the hope that keeps me trusting

You are the life to my soul

You are my purpose

You're everything

And how can I stand here with you

And not be moved by you

Would you tell me how could it be any better than this?

 I think it's important that the singer is not asking anything of the person this song is about. Just acknowledging the awesomeness of them and how much they mean to the singer. He doesn't want any more than to just be in their presence. Yes, this song is often interpreted as being directed towards God, which makes sense since Lifehouse started out as a Christian band. In fact, when I was younger and trying out different religious practices, I watched my friend in a skit set to this song at her Baptist church. Basically, angels were protecting this girl who was going through a rough time and Em was the demon trying to get past their protective circle around her. I've seen similar skits on YouTube - they're always moving, but I think that's because this song is moving. I don't see how anybody could listen to it and not get the feels, so listen to it sparingly. I should take my own advice - this song has been running through my head all day. The video is just the lyrics - there is no official video. I think that's how it's meant to be enjoyed - just pure sound, no visuals, nothing else needed.

"Everything" Video