"Mirror, Mirror" by M2M

I'm feeling a bit nostalgic, so I'm bringing back M2M. M2M was a pop duo from Norway and "Mirror Mirror" was big in 2000. Well, it felt like it was a big hit but I watched a lot of Disney channel, back when they were first starting to realize that marketing to pre-teens and teenagers could be lucrative. They also went on tour with Hanson that year and it was rumored that Marion Raven was dating Zac Hanson. Needless to say, I was super jealous (even though I was only 12 and had absolutely no chance of ever dating Zac Hanson). Seriously, the things I remember from my childhood. You don't have to tell me I'm a dork....I already know....

Mirrors have a lot of symbolism in literature, especially fairy tales. Most often, Mirrors unveil uncomfortable truths. For example, in "Snow White," the Magic Mirror reveals to the Evil Queen that she is not the fairest in the land, for her stepdaughter gets more beautiful every day and will soon surpass even the Queen's beauty. Mirrors can also function as a reflection of subconscious desires, as seen in Goethe's "Faust." While mirrors can denote wisdom and self-knowledge, they can also symbolize vanity and warn of the perils of too much self-regard. We see this in the myth of Narcissus, when he falls in love with the reflection of himself and drowns. But in fairy tales, mirrors - and magic mirrors especially - don't always reflect the truth. In "The Snow Queen" by Hans Christian Andersen, which is what "Frozen" is loosely based on, the mirror distorts everything that is reflected in it. Something that is beautiful will be shown as ugly and vice versa. In the story, the mirror shatters and pieces of it get into Kai's eyes and heart, and he turns bitter and cruel because the only thing he can see is lies and ugliness. Ultimately, Kai is returned to his former self when his True Love, Gerda, weeps over him, which burns away the splinters from the magic mirror.

Obviously, the song "Mirror Mirror" is drawing from the story of "Snow White." So here we go....another reason why I identify with Snow White is because I often thought of my mom as the Evil Queen. She used to spend over an hour getting ready, putting on a full face of makeup before leaving the house. And then, she would criticize me and my sisters for not being beautiful enough, as if it was a reflection on her. I often felt like I took the brunt of the criticism because I look the most like her, and I guess she didn't like what she saw. In all honesty, it fucked up my self-esteem something awful. Most of my adult life, I've tried to avoid the level of vanity that my mom embraced. I don't wear much make-up, I don't spend a lot on expensive beauty treatments...I just generally don't spend much time or money on myself, because I feel like it's selfish. I'm trying to get out of that mindset, because it's not. I do a million selfless things a day (or so it feels), so it won't kill anyone if I get a facial or a massage. Even so, I've gotten to a place where I like what I see in the mirror. I'm not perfect, but my reflection is someone I respect. Unlike poor M2M....

Why don't I like the girl I see

The one who's standing right in front of me

Why don't I think before I speak

I should have listened to that voice inside me

I must be stupid must be crazy must be out of my mind

To say the kind of things I said last night

It sounds like M2M (I'm just going to refer to them as a single entity, because it's easier) fucked up big time. She started a big fight with her boyfriend and he's not coming back. Inevitably, regret settles in and she's praying to the mirror to change what she's done, because she's disappointed in herself. Honestly, she says all she should've done is say "I'm sorry" and I don't understand why she can't pick up the phone to apologize now. She's moping instead of taking the appropriate action and, to be honest, I'm not sure I feel sorry for her. I always apologize when I'm wrong. Heck, I'll even apologize when I was right but said mean things. Because stubbornness and pride are probably the worst things for a relationship. Anyway, Marion Raven does look quite lovely in the video - very much like how I'd picture Snow White. Almost as lovely as Lily Collins in the film "Mirror, Mirror" but not quite. Even though the movie kind of sucked, Collins looked gorgeous in like every frame. Just another person I wished I looked like....

"Mirror, Mirror" Video

"Castle" by Halsey

As I mentioned yesterday, I've been spending a lot of time in the dark and twisty feels. For me, those feels always inevitably devolve into anger. Feeling angry is always better than feeling empty. I'm a very passionate person and also one that feels like you have to do something if you're feeling down. I've never been one of those people who mopes. In fact, that kind of annoys me. If you're feeling bad, do something about it. Have an adventure, get a massage, create something beautiful - anything is better than doing nothing. And I know anger is not the same thing as passion but it's a strong motivator to get you to do something your passionate about or pursue a goal/dream that, otherwise, you wouldn't. The science behind that - Anger is triggered in your hippocampus. Emotions triggered in this region of the brain - anger, lust, fear - are instinctual and not always logical. As such, you don't think too much about your actions in the heat of the moment, you just do what feels right. Given two seconds of thought, though, your cerebellum has time to catch up and you can make a more logical choice about what to do with those feelings, but that doesn't mean they aren't as potent anymore. Quite the opposite - now, you can harness them to do what needs to be done. Okay, here comes the woo-woo stuff, in epic rant form.

Halsey in the official "Castle" Video

Lately, I've been noticing how draining being around certain people can be and my gut reaction is to turn that negativity into anger. I'm rather empathic, so I tend to take on others' energy, or let people siphon off mine, if I don't do something to protect myself. And I'm not very good at doing protection magic. I ground and clear every day, but this doesn't have the same effect as actually doing good protection magic. I'll start off the day all bright and shiny but by the end, I'll be utterly depleted unless I do something that makes me happy - like looking at funny memes on Twitter, listening to music, or escaping for a few minutes to take a walk outside. I have an amethyst necklace that I wear some days (amethyst was used for protection talismans back in the olden days), which helps, but it doesn't go with everything. Silly reason, I know. I should probably get a ring. No one notices if a ring doesn't match your outfit. Anyway, I let people who don't care anything about me take away my inner peace and strength, and I shouldn't. Harnessing the anger makes me feel more powerful, because without, I'm weak. And I guess that's how I protect myself.

There's a couple of songs Halsey wrote that are amazing to listen to when I want to feel this power. One is absolutely perfect for the October theme, so you'll get that in a few weeks. The other one is "Castle." The lyrics are basically saying that she's tired of being weak, tired of people taking advantage of her, so she's going to take what she wants. She's all out of fucks to give and if people think she's cold and cruel, she's going to be cold and cruel. I've been getting to that point and I have these flashes, this feeling that I'd burn the world down if I could. Sometimes, I think I probably could, if I concentrated hard enough. It's kind of scary but also intoxicating. I told you - being angry is better than the alternative, which is to be defeated. But don't worry - I would be a wise and just Queen once I've rebuilt everything from the ashes.

Oh, all these minutes passing, sick of feeling used

If you wanna break these walls down, you’re gonna get bruised

Now my neck is open wide, begging for a fist around it

Already choking on my pride, so there's no use crying about it

"Castle" was used in the promos for "The Huntsman: Winter's War." "The Huntsman" is the sequel/prequel to "Snow White & the Huntsman" which, in my opinion, wasn't the greatest movie. Don't get me wrong - I love me some twisted fairytales, especially when it's a retelling of Snow White. However, as pretty as Kristen Stewart is, her acting style annoys me. I don't know how you can act without showing emotion, without being animated. Charlize Theron was perfectly cast as the Wicked Queen, to the point where I was hoping she'd win in the end. And, of course, Chris Hemsworth is beautiful and, as such, I didn't mind watching his portrayal as the Huntsman. I haven't seen "The Huntsman" yet, mostly because the first movie was pretty meh. However, the trailers made it seem interesting. There's a lot more Charlize Theron - which was probably a good plot choice - and they also added Jessica Chastain and Emily Blunt, both of whom are very talented. I think Emily Blunt is supposed to be The Ice Queen (like Elsa in "Frozen") and Jessica Chastain was another Huntsman and Chris Hemsworth love interest. There is probably a love triangle or quadrangle, but as I've said, I haven't seen it so that's just wild supposition on my part. (Note: I just read the plot summary - that is not what happens at all.) It might be worth watching once, just to say I did. There was an official video but it shortens the song by nearly two minutes. I really hate when they do that - if it was meant to be two minutes shorter, than the album version would be two minutes shorter. Instead, I'm including the Vevo video from the album release. Happy Saturday...Enjoy!

"Castle" Video

"Snow White Queen" by Evanescence

Snow White has always been one of my favorite fairy tales. It's a classic and you can't beat a classic. In my head, I sort of identify with Snow White, especially when growing up. When I was younger, my grandmother often said I reminded her of Snow White - I was always a pale little thing with long black hair. Then we moved to Arizona and I tanned up a bit. Now, I have a little Snow White of my own - my little boy has the same dark hair and rosy cheeks as I had as a baby. So beautiful - the fairest little boy in all the land, in my opinion, but I'm biased. Not many people know where Snow White originates but it comes from the Ulster Cycle, an Irish epic. It is the story of Deirdre of the Sorrows. It's only a small part of the epic but it's one of the most tragic...Just a warning, there's a lot Gaelic names in this story, so try to keep up.

Deirdre and Naoise

When Deirdre was born, it was prophesied that she would be a great beauty. As such, King Conchobar hid her away so he could keep her for himself when she was old enough to marry. He secluded her in an isolated cabin in the woodlands outside his castle, to be raised by a wise woman, Leabharcham. The young girl told her caretaker that she would fall in love with a man with the same coloring as a raven in the snow - hair as black as a raven's feathers, skin as white as snow, and cheeks the color of blood. The wise woman, knowing a young man of such qualities, conspired to bring the two together. Leabharcham lured Naoise to the woods, where he met Deirdre, and the two young people fell in love. They lived in the woods together for some time, happy and free.

But King Conchobar eventually found out and was furious. After sending a spy to confirm that Deirdre was still beautiful, his army attacked their home. Naoise and his brothers fought valiantly but ultimately, they all died. Naoise was killed by a spear by the king's most loyal warrior, Eogan mac Durthacht. King Conchobar took Deirdre for his wife but she was cold towards him. As punishment for her coldness, he offered her up to Eogan for sex. Rather than be raped by the man who killed her True Love, she threw herself in front of a chariot and her head was dashed upon the rocks. Fin.

Can't save your life

Though nothing I bleed for

Is more tormenting

I'm losing my mind

And you just stand there

And stare as my world divides

I don't know why True Love has to end in heartbreak, it just does. Even in real life, it does - even if you have a happy life together - because someone has to die first. Anyway, I chose this song because I like Evanescence. This song gets pretty dark (which is how I like 'em) because she's describing being obsessed with her love, this Snow White Queen, who seems to be out of her reach. Obsessive love is a common theme for gothic metal. When you can't get someone out of your head and they're the only thing you can think about. And when you think of something that much, eventually it's going to leak into your subconscious and every single dream you have will include them. That's just how brains work. Seems unhealthy....Maybe Amy Lee should get a hobby to get her mind off this Snow White Queen. Something to distract her - like a new puppy. Overall, the songs on "The Open Door" seem to be about an obsessive kind of love. The content and depth of the lyrics, combined with the incorporation of gothic rock and the use of choral and symphonic elements gives the entire album this amazing, dramatic sound. Really makes you feel the dark and twisty feels. I've probably been spending too much time in that level of vibration. But Samhain approaches, so it's appropriate. It's the time for facing your shadow self and acknowledging that your demons exist. And it's better to do something constructive - write a song/poem/story, make art, dance wildly and with abandon - before the demon's obsession consumes you.

"Snow White Queen" Video

"Blinding" by Florence + the Machine

Another gem from my savior, Florence Welch. "Blinding" is kind of a break up song. She was in love, maybe she still is, but reality set in. It's the worst feeling when you realize that being in love with someone doesn't fix everything in your life. You still have responsibilities, all those problems you were ignoring are still there when you wake up from a cloud of infatuation. I think Florence's inspiration for "Blinding" was that stupid saying that "Love is blind." It's not - infatuation is blind. Real love is when you finally escape the addicted feeling and you're awake enough to see that the other person is not perfect - just a normal human - but you still want to be around them anyway. "Stranger in a Strange Land" summed up love best - "Love is that condition in which the happiness of another person is essential to your own."

"Blinding" borrows the imagery of the sleeping princess, like from Sleeping Beauty or Snow White (who makes an appearance in the song). Let's lay it all out there on the table - True Love's Kiss symbolized sexual awakening in classic fairy tales. The princess couldn't be saved until some prince/knight/knave/what-have-you awakened those desires. This is based on the assumption that sex starts with a kiss (which it usually does, unless you're Julia Roberts in "Pretty Woman"). Obviously, Florence isn't using that particular symbolism here. Instead, the dream-like state she was in was that infatuation phase I was telling you about - the "Honeymoon" period, which is a real thing that happens. You have the "butterflies in your stomach feeling" and everything is all shiny and new. Like a trip into Wonderland. And it can last for a long time, if there aren't any complications. That's why experts say you shouldn't get married to someone until after you've been together for a year, by which time the Honeymoon period usually wears off. Now, not all relationships last that long, obviously - hence those complications. Especially when you're older, real life creeps in a lot faster. People realize their limitations a lot sooner. And Love, even if it exists, does not conquer all.

And I could hear the thunder and see the lightning crack

And all around the world was waking, I never could go back

'Cause all the walls of dreaming, they were torn right open

And finally it seemed that the spell was broken

The quickness of it can feel disorienting, which is what the lyrics are trying to capture. The initial infatuation can make you feel weightless and young, and when it's over, everything seems to crumble and you just want to get it back. But you can't ever get it back. So what do you do when it ends? Do you let yourself become bitter? Depressed? Do you stop eating and sleeping? Do you let it destroy you? Florence Welch proposes something better than that - acknowledging that it's over. Once you do this, eventually, you move on - Snow White stitches up the circuit boards, i.e., your heart and mind heal and you're capable of loving again. And that's the happy ending. You will survive, just like Gloria Gaynor.

Thanks for listening to my cynical rambling. For your reward, you may listen to the song.

"Blinding" Video