The Heroine's Journey ("One of the Greats" by Florence + the Machine)

For the past few years, I've created a pair of playlists every year. One is the vibe of the year, which is based on the energy I'm sensing around New Year's and add to it as I find songs that fit that energy; the other is my "Jess is Awesome!" playlist, which I've made for my birthday every year for the past four years. While the Vibe of the Year usually grows as the year progresses, I make an effort to choose about 10-15 songs for my birthday playlist to encapsulate the moment. To some extent, it captures my mood at the time of creation. For example, "Volume 2: In My Feels" featured "Desert Song" by MCR, "Stronger" by Hanson, and "Jenny, You're Barely Alive" by Rilo Kiley - clearly, I was going through something. Volume 3, in contrast, featured songs like "Golden" by Huntr/x, "In My Blood" by Shawn Mendes, and "Across the Universe" by the Beatles. One of the themes for that year was "Dying Star," which still feels like taking a deep breath of air when I listen to it. The first year was mostly songs that capture my essence, including my namesake, "Jessica" by the Allman Brothers. 

There are some eccentric and unofficial rules around the "Jess is awesome!" playlist. The first is that there's usually a theme song I choose (sometimes two, if I'm feeling especially Gemini Rising). The second - and this seems to be unintentional - but there must always be one Hanson song. Luckily, they have a pretty sizeable repertoire. And third - it's not going to change after July 6th, so the songs must be selected with intention. I was struggling a bit with composing the playlist this year. but I finally put it together a couple of days before my birthday, in a fit of inspiration. Right in the nick of time. For this year, the songs are largely aspirational and motivational - the attitude and perspective I would like to embody (or am embodying) as well as ideas I would like to bring into my life this year. As you may have guessed by the title of this post, "One of the Greats" is my theme for my 39th revolution around the Sun.

******

I've been pre-occupied with this idea of greatness. Or, more precisely, this intense introspection into whether or not I'm doing what I was put on this planet to do. More often than not, the answer feels like a resounding "No!" Don't get me wrong - I am really good at my mundane job. And I could probably keep climbing up the ladder indefinitely....but do I want to? True, it keeps me busy - my days are a whirlwind of bullshit that keeps me spinning from task to task. Occasionally, it gets interesting. I'm proud of the things I've accomplished. I like the people I work with (for the most part). And I love the financial stability - arguably the best part of the job (and most mundane jobs) is the salary. That being said - if I won the lottery tomorrow, I'd be out of there in a heartbeat. It's a means to an end.

The harsh reality is that purpose is pursued in the dim light of early mornings and the darkness after bedtime hugs. It's built in the span of a couple free hours on weekends and on breaks during the work day. Often it feels like toiling with no outcome - there is only The Work. Often, there is no tangible reward so you must learn to love the process. It's about the journey and not the destination. And even then, even if you love it, you can burn yourself out from the disappointment. It takes discipline and devotion, when you have nothing left to give. At which point, you just start digging out the bottom of a dry well. In theory, that's where the good stuff is anyway.

In the past - and even now - I struggle with wondering if I'm wasting my time on this. I'm no good at this writing thing, so I should give up. There's no money in it, there's too much competition, everyone is writing something - what more could I have to offer? It used to make me quite depressed and - as the huge blank spaces in the timeline of this blog can attest - unmotivated to write anything, even when I'm overflowing with inspiration. But lately, there's this little voice inside saying, "Who gives a shit?" And instead of scrolling another hour when I get those thoughts, I've been coming here or to my Scrivener projects or to one of my many notebooks....and doing the work. My mind has been so loud this year. And there's really only one way to quiet it. 

******

There are some songs I wish I could just shoot into my veins, they are so thoroughly in my blood when I hear them. This latest album from Florence perfectly captures where I am right now. Her albums often do that.  I think it's because we're so close in age (she was born in 1986, about 10 months before me), so we're going through a lot of the same milestones at the same time. That's why I originally wanted to write a 33 1/3 book about "Ceremonials" - in my 20s, it perfectly encapsulated where I was on my journey. Recently, I realized I don't resonate with it as much anymore. Maybe I've overheard the songs too much, or maybe I just have the latest album to compare the feeling to. I still love it but in a different way. The songs on "Everybody Scream" speak of overcoming loss and grief, and I've been through a bit of that in recent years. Florence experienced a miscarriage due to an ectopic pregnancy prior to writing "Everybody Scream." She nearly died herself. I cannot begin to tell you how devastating pregnancy trauma can be. And though I haven't experienced a miscarriage myself, others in my family have gone through the pain of losing children they desperately wanted. It leaves a scar. My heart goes out to her. Art often exists as a byproduct of healing these deep, soul-sucking wounds. I want you to keep that in mind as new technology brings up questions of what the purpose of art is, who gets to be creative, the importance of the creative process, and what is art anyway. Be prepared - we are about to go on a long journey through the lyrics of "One of the Greats." 

I crawled up from under the earth

Broken nails and coughing dirt

Spitting out my songs so you could sing along, oh

And with each bedraggled breath, I knew I came back from the dead

To show you how it's done, to show you what it takes

To conquer and to crucify, to become one of the greats

One of the greats

The first verse begins where many stories do - at the end. She went through a Death. This may have been her miscarriage story - in your story, it could be a loss of identity brought about by any number of things - and yet, in spite of that Death, she has to carry on. There are expectations, responsibilities, contracts she needs to fulfill. The show must go on, regardless of how she's feeling. Regardless of what she is going through. That's what it takes to be one of the greats - you keep going, even when you have nothing left in you. Yes, we state the underlying lesson at the beginning, because that's how you tell a story. The conflict and the lesson are usually co-present at the start, albeit dressed in poetic drapery. 

I kept a scream inside my chest, killed everyone I'd ever kissed

Hung them on the wall like trophies, each name, a stain upon my lips

I told the truth but could never see it through

You see yourself hung on the wall but that song is not about you

I wrote down all my fumbling visions transmitted by a television

Got everything I thought I wanted and cried hungover in a hotel closet

This is, arguably, my favorite verse. It's about the creative process. One of the most amazing things about Florence is that she's very soft-spoken in interviews - at the concert we went to in May, when she would talk to the audience, she sounded so quiet and delicate. But, man, when she sang, she filled the arena. It was amazing to behold. I find that's true about a lot of artists - even myself, at times. When I was acting, I was often told it was "scary" how I could transform into the characters. I became a different person on the stage and then morph back into this quiet, shy girl when rehearsal was over. This is the magic of the creative process - it draws something out of us when we don't feel like we're able to express it in other ways. When we don't feel like we can scream, even though the emotions we're feeling are bursting out of our chest. "I told the truth but could never see it through/You see yourself hung on the wall but that song is not about you." I found myself ruminating deeply on this lyric during my daily commute this summer. It reminds me of Anne Lamott's writing advice (which I'll paraphrase) - tell the truth but change the names....for legal reasons.

What I've realized lately is The Movie Star - or The Journalist or The Poet or The Exorcist or whatever stupid name I give people to explain their place in my story - they're all just characters in my performance. They're shadows at best. The Muse has always been me. These voices in my head are mine alone. The magic flows from my thoughts and ideas, regardless of what's happening in my life. Art is a process. You hear a song or read a book, and we think it's about a certain person in the artist's life, but it's not! It's about their experience. It's about them. A prime example of this is Taylor Swift - we point to lyrics and scream it's about Jake Gyllenhaal or Joe Alwyn, but no! All her songs are about her experience, her feelings, her fears and aspirations and troubles. Except "Wood" - I'm 99% sure that's about her husband's cock. Weird choice to put on an album but I'll allow it. I'm sure I've written spicier stuff so I've no place to judge.

Did I get it right? Do I win the prize?

Do you regret bringing me back to life?

Arms outstretched, back from the dead

Streetlights bursting overhead

Arms outstretched, back from the dead

Streetlights bursting overhead

I did my best, tried to impress, my childhood dream made flesh

And my dresses and my flowering sadness, so like a woman to profit from her madness

I was only beautiful under the lights, only powerful there

Burned down at thirty-six

Why did you dig me up for this?

Moving on. They - and by they, I mean the earth-bound ancestors who have written books about writing and the creative process - say that you start putting out the best work when you don't care anymore. When you're not trying to win anything. When you don't care about the views or the money. When you've scraped the bottom of your grief and have come up empty. When you're doing it just for yourself - that's when the magic becomes unbound. I wonder if I've gotten to that point yet. Or is this the same old drivel I've always written? If it is, do I care? I paused to consider it just now and all I felt was silence. I guess that's as clear a "no" as any. The truth is I wish I could profit from my madness - I think we all do - but even if I never make a dime from my writing, I'll still be doing it. I'm burned out from trying so hard, from being so aware of what I'm putting out there - hoping it's good, hoping it's worth reading, hoping it won't be misconstrued or misinterpreted. The expectations are overwhelming, when it feels like so much of what I'm writing is just screaming into the void. And that's where I am right now - the Void. Nobody can hear me scream here, so why am I doing it? The best answer I've got is I just gotta do it. 

You'll bury me again, you'll say it's all pretend

That I could never be great being held up against such male tastes

'Cause who really gets to be one of the greats, one of the greats?

But I've really done it this time, this one is all mine

I'll be up there with the man and the ten other women

And the hundred greatest records of all time

It must be nice to be a man and make boring music just because you can

Now don't get me wrong, I'm a fan

You're my second favorite frontman

And you could have me if you weren't so afraid of me

It's funny how men don't find power very sexy

So this one's for the ladies

Do I drive you crazy?

Did I get it right?

Easily one of the best bridges I've ever heard. Because who really gets to decide who becomes one of the greats? Historically, it's been men. That's not just me being radically feminist (even if I am) - every day seems to unearth another woman whose contributions to the world have been forgotten or overshadowed or even stolen by the men she worked with. The truth is, women often feel they need to be extraordinary just to hold on to what they have, because the bar is set too high in order to keep them down. I've seen it myself, being in a heavily male-dominated industry. The assumption I've most encountered in my career is I'm too timid to be a leader. And I'm not - I've shown time and time again I am outspoken and smart and have good ideas, sometimes better ideas than my male counterparts. The people I work with closely learn this pretty quick, but it's always the men (and occasionally women) two or three levels above me who have developed this false impression of who I am. That starting assumption is difficult to overcome. Recently, I've realized I've been taking on a lot of extra work at my job and the underlying reason has been to prove I'm worthy of a promotion. But I know I'm worthy of a director-level position. In many cases, I've been doing work my own managers should've been doing, advocating for things my leadership should've already been planning for - and I'm tired of burning myself out for people who have already made up their mind about me.

But the flip side of that coin is being a capable and intelligent woman means that the men you encounter who recognize your brilliance are often intimidated or even afraid of you. If I had a dollar for every man who said I scared them, I'd probably have like $10. Which doesn't sound like much but, psychologically, it takes a toll. Most women's response to this fear - including my younger self - is to make themselves smaller so others feel comfortable and safe. Dimming their light to be less frightening. Even in romantic relationships, many women worry about things like being the breadwinner or letting potential partners win at competitive games so they don't damage a fragile ego. After nearly four decades of living the female experience, I can tell you this isn't the way to go. You deserve to be seen for how beautiful and amazing you are - and if that scares some people away, the Universe is doing you a favor. It's trying to save you from the heartache of losing yourself, which is way more painful than any breakup or lost promotion could ever be. 

Side note - and this absolutely will come up in the future - I love the lyric "you're my second favorite frontman." It always makes me wonder who she's talking about. I've decided it's Dave Matthews. I know I'm probably 100% wrong but it's way funnier than whoever she's actually singing about. It is now official lore. I declare it.

There are many other things I love about this song. The supernatural elements of Florence's work always excites my witchy spirit. I love the symbolism of Death and Rebirth, because Life is just a continuous cycle of Death and Rebirth. It goes without saying but I highly recommend checking out "Everybody Scream." I have quite a few favorites from this album, all of which I plan to write about throughout the rest of this year. I have the posts brewing already.

Thanks for reading my friends. If you feel called to comment, here's your question: What are you creating today?

"One of the Greats" Music Video

"Barely Breathing" by Duncan Sheik

 Spotify has this feature where it will take all the songs you listen to most often (within the last couple months or so, depending on how long you've been using Spotify) and put them into a personalized playlist named "On Repeat." Over the next few posts, I've decided to share a few songs that have recently landed on my "On Repeat" playlist. Some of them are new discoveries, some of them are forgotten gems, and probably too many of them are mid-90s to early-00s classics. Also, I'm very aware that this blog has been heavy on female-fronted music lately and this will add a lot more vocal/genre diversity.

"Barely Breathing" was released in 1996. It's about a guy who is starting to realize his girlfriend's emotional outbursts are manipulative. Her excessive emotionality is not actually the love he's wanting from her. She's using her tears - or more specifically, his empathy - to get what she wants out of him without actually reciprocating his feelings or meeting his needs in the relationship. Obviously, he cares for her but he's catching on that it's not as mutual as she says it is. In the lyrics to "Barely Breathing," it sounds like he's decided to walk away. And maybe he's done this in the past and he's gone back to her after she offered an empty apology, a lot of tears and excuses, and maybe even some sex. But this time, he knows she's not going to change and, if he gives in, he's just going to be in this same situation again. And when you're having the same conversations over and over again with someone, guess what? You're stuck in a pattern. And, at some level, they know you'll settle for whatever they're willing to give because you're more invested than they are. A second chance is okay. You might even be able to justify a third chance. But anything more than that is self-betrayal.

I know what you're doing

I see it all too clear

I only taste the saline

When I kiss away your tears

You really had me goin'

Wishin' on a star

The black holes that surround you

Are heavier by far

I believed in your confusion

You were so completely torn

It must've been that yesterday

Was the day that I was born

There's not much to examine

There's nothing left to hide

You really can't be serious

If you have to ask me why

I say goodbye

I follow Dr. Nicole LePera and watch a lot of her videos. She says that compromising on our needs and settling for a situation that makes us unhappy is self-betrayal. What Sheik's girlfriend is probably doing is called "breadcrumbing" and it's a common behavior in toxic relationships. Essentially, she's doing just enough so he won't leave, but she has no interest in doing any more than that. And that's fine but they probably shouldn't be in a relationship if she's not at least willing to try to meet his minimum needs and vice versa. People get stuck in these relationship patterns out of subconscious fears. In the past, Sheik probably accepted how she treated him because he had a misguided belief that what he wanted in a relationship was "too much" and was afraid asking her to meet his needs would result in her leaving him. With the right person/people, you won't be afraid of asking for what you want and they won't make you feel like you're asking for too much. If you ask them to change their behavior, they will. And not just for a couple of weeks or months - they'll make a conscious effort to meet your needs and respect your boundaries for the long term. And that's what reciprocity and mutual affection looks like. 

'Cause I am barely breathing

And I can't find the air

I don't know who I'm kidding

Imagining you care

And I could stand here waiting

A fool for another day

I don't suppose it's worth the price

And worth the price, the price that I would pay

But I'm thinking it over anyway

I'm thinking it over anyway

I'm one of those people for whom emotional pleas are super effective. I can't stand it when I see someone crying, I feel compelled to try and help. Or at least listen. My upbringing has resulted in me being hypersensitive to emotional cues and, in some cases, I'm even over reactive to them. My default assumption when someone close isn't talking to me is that they're angry with me (a remnant of liberal neglect, withholding affection, and the silent treatment). However, on the plus side, it has turned me into a human lie detector. Maybe it's made me a bit cynical but I think tears that come out during conflict are manipulative. Some people have learned to use them as weapons (and, not to be sexist but in my experience, most of them are women). And the tears always come out when you're trying to hold them accountable for their bad behavior and poor treatment of you. Sheik brings this up in the lyrics - "I only taste the saline when I kiss away your tears" - he knows there's nothing real behind them. Purely mechanical. They are always accompanied by a lot of excuses, but no real apologies or acceptance of responsibility. They play the victim - "Oh, I was feeling some sort of way so I took it out on you." You assume they feel bad because they're crying but they just feel bad because you're not letting them get away with things. The tears are a distraction to make you feel guilty for bringing it up. But actions speak louder than words and the best apology is changed behavior. What they do after you talk to them matters more than any tearful promises they make in the moment.

But Duncan Sheik is human and he has a heart. He knows he probably shouldn't go into this situation again, especially now that he can see the pattern. But he cares about this person - maybe even loves her - so he's "thinking it over anyway." He shouldn't. Based on the rest of the lyrics, he knows what he should do. Sticking around when someone is hurting you isn't love - it's codependency. He's the one who is "barely breathing," which shows that - in these situations - walking away hurts you more than it hurts them, no matter how emotional they seem to be. And that's ultimately what this song is about.

"Barely Breathing" Video

"Sympathetic Magic" by Charming Disaster

Pam Grossman, host of "The Witch Wave" podcast, created a playlist to celebrate the release of her book, "Waking the Witch: Reflections on Women, Magic, and Power." I've been listening through it to discover witchy-themed music and found a few new favorites. This one got stuck in my head this morning. I thought it was clever in both the context and format. It's a duet and, like a lot of duets, it is organized as a "call and response" type song. You hear her side, then his, and then - the part that I like the most - is when they overlap. They're singing different lyrics at the same time, which creates this beautiful cacophony for a moment before the chorus harmonizes both parts. As for the story, it's very simple. Boy meets girl at a seance. They feel a connection but they separate anyway. However, the girl is a witch and she uses sympathetic magic (essentially a "voodoo doll") on him. And every time he feels it, he thinks of her.

It's not the same as the real thing

Might like this better instead

I know you're thinking of me

When I'm thinking that

We are connected

We are connected

The album this is from is called "Cautionary Tales," so I wonder what the lesson is here. Don't fall in love with a witch - not even once? I think that's the moral of a lot of stories, to be honest. One of the earliest witch stories I remember was an American folktale. It was in the book that sparked my interest in witches so long ago, and I think it was one of my favorites. In the story, there's this woman who started having terrible headaches. Migraines, every single day (which I can imagine would be a nightmare). Her quality of life for her and her family goes down because it impairs her ability to do anything required of colonial life. Her husband begins an affair with the suspected town witch. Suspected because she's incredibly beautiful, with long dark hair and dark eyes, and she lives alone. The woman knows but the migraines prevent her from doing anything about it, so she goes to a known healer (commonly referred to as "white witch" in early Americana) for a cure. The white witch tells her that there's nothing he can do because she's been bewitched. The person who cursed her had gotten hold of some strands of her hair and had sown them beneath the pelt of a hare. Until this hare is killed, the migraines will persist. Furthermore, the white witch says to kill the witch who cursed her, the woman should shoot a silver bullet through an image of the witch.

So the woman lives on in pain for months until, one day, she's in her garden and the migraines magically stop. She's so happy that she begins to sing. A hunter follows her singing and stops by to say "hello," which is when she notices that one of his kills is a hare. When she asks about it, the hunter brags that he's the best shot around. As a test, she draws the image of a woman on a piece of wood. She requests that the hunter shoot the image through the leg and he does so successfully. Later in the day, she hears that the beautiful witch has taken ill with a pain through the leg. The next day, the witch dies, and the woman is racked with guilt because she is sure she is the one who murdered her. Until she learns that the witch's own brother shot an image of her with an actual silver bullet, not ordinary buckshot like the hunter.

I knew from your demeanor (Make a little totem)

That you were a kindred soul (Fetish doll effigy)

Your smile was so familiar (Put in it a token)

And I couldn't let you go (Something that comes from me)

It's a sympathetic magic (Sympathetic magic)

Pulls us together close (Are we doomed? Are we cursed?)

It's a sympathetic magic (Sympathetic magic)

It's the thing I love the most (It could always be worse)

Sympathetic magic is a type of magic based on imitation or correspondence. Most of the spells and magic that people are familiar with are sympathetic magic in some form or another. Some examples:  making a sachet for abundance (mint, maybe cinnamon) or love (rose petals, basil); burning certain colored candles and anointing them with special oils or carving intentions into the wax; burning pictures of people or writing down/saying their names; or, most famously, using items taken from a person (such as hair, nails, maybe even blood) to create a poppet to represent them.

It's a tricky subject in the witchcraft community. There are some who believe that one should never use magic to manipulate and control others. There are others who believe that doing things like curses or hexes can be acceptable if it adds to the overall good of the world. There are still others who think they should be able to use magic to further their aims, regardless of whether or not it affects the free will of others. Some believe there are consequences (bad karma, the Threefold Law) and some believe it is just morally wrong, regardless if there are consequences for the caster. I won't go into any diatribes on where I stand - people can make their own choices. But, as far as magic goes, it's considered fairly powerful. Sympathetic magic began in prehistoric times - if you're familiar with the Lascaux Caves in France, it has been hypothesized that the cave drawings were created as part of a ceremony to ensure a successful hunt. We even see it today in modern rituals, such as the culmination of Burning Man and the Burning of Zozobra that happens in Santa Fe every year (which is coming up at the end of August). Torching these effigies is meant to banish sadness, strife, and bondage on a collective scale.

Of course, no discussion of sympathetic magic is complete without mentioning the obvious: voodoo dolls. Although it's most commonly associated with the African diaspora practices that developed in Haiti and the Southern United States, various forms are practiced in many cultures and poppet magic in particular has roots in Europe. The idea is simple - make a doll, tie it to a person by making it in their likeness or adding items associated with that person, and then use pins to pierce the doll. This practice can be used for healing purposes as well, such as through distance reiki or anointing the doll and praying over it. Poppets, effigies, and totems - they're all just tools. Like with everything, it's your intentions that matter most.

One final question I had on the song, though - the lyrics in the chorus are "It's not the same as the real thing/Might like this better instead." Why? Perhaps the real thing removes all the mystery and magic.  I might be pondering that for awhile.

"Sympathetic Magic" Video

6 Tips for Curating a Killer Playlist

While I was putzing around the airport the other day, I had a chance to distill my knowledge of making playlists into six guidelines. I wouldn't call myself an expert on playlist building - one of the reasons I'm not writing this for "Self" or "Marie Claire" - but I have fucked up enough playlists to know that these six rules are a pretty solid foundation. Some will be self-evident, others arbitrary, but all have a reason for being on this list. Disregard at your own peril.

1. Choose a Central Theme. This is your "why" for the playlist. Why do you want to build a playlist? Maybe this is your workout mix or you want to set the mood for going out on a girl's night. Whatever your reason, make sure you identify that is, because it's the foundation for all the other rules. It also has the added benefit of making difficult song choices easier, because you understand the playlist's raison d'etre - it's reason for even existing in the first place. If you take a moment to think about it, I think most people instinctively know what songs they'd put on a Party-themed mix versus what they want to listen to while they're studying for a test. You can be really creative with this. There's an astrologer I follow on Twitter, Chani Nicholas, who builds playlists as a horoscope for each sign (which are amazing btw - if you're on Spotify, just search for #CosmicPlaylist). I've seen fellow witches/pagans build "Money Manifestation" playlists filled with money themed songs. Personally, I have a playlist with all the songs I think would be great to build a burlesque routine around. Anything goes when you're choosing the theme. And the more specific you get, the more targeted your playlist will be, which means you'll have to do less editing in the long run.
2. Remember the "Vibe." Knowing what vibe you want for your playlist is simple as asking yourself one simple question - "How do I want to feel while I'm listening to this playlist?" I say that it's simple, but it's probably one of the most complicated questions a person can ask themselves, mostly because a lot of people are afraid of feeling their feelings (but that's a rant for the other day). Yes, you absolutely can create a playlist of songs that make you cry (in fact, I'd encourage it, just for the cathartic benefits alone), but most people are building playlists to set the mood for happy times, like birthday parties or road trips. Remembering the vibe requires you to think critically about the emotional impact a song has on you. For instance, I was talking to the coworker I was traveling with about Lana Del Rey - we both like her music, but I think he put it accurately when he said that he feels like he wants to kill himself with a Twizzler afterwards. All of her songs have a melancholic quality to them and - let's face it - melancholy is just romanticized sadness, my friends. So if you want to feel sad and wistful about an ex, by all means, load it up with some Lana Del Rey, but she probably doesn't belong on a Hype Mix. Another thing to remember about the vibe may be that you're looking for a certain type of music - a certain genre or maybe a specific sound. Pandora used to be good about this, when they were true to their whole goal about recommending songs with the same "musical DNA." Although, that didn't always work. I remember wanting a playlist with pop songs that had a Middle Eastern flair to it, based on "Beautiful Liar" by Beyonce and Shakira. Unfortunately, Pandora interpreted that musical DNA as "more Beyonce, please." Don't get me wrong - I like me some Queen Bey, but that's not what I was going for and it's the primary reason why I believe human ears are crucial to the playlist creation business.
3. For working out, use the beats per minute (BPM) as a guide. There have been numerous studies on the impact of music on a person's activity intensity while working out. The higher the beats per minute, the more intense the workout. The reason for this is that the body subconsciously matches the rhythm of the music, so if the music is moving faster, the body will naturally move faster or with greater power. You can use this to your advantage while building your work out playlists. There are plenty of resources out there to identify what BPM is right for each type of workout but a rough guide would be this: 140+ BPM songs are great for high intensity workouts (running, HIIT, cycling, dancing), 100-139 BPM are going to be for moderate intensity workouts (endurance running, strength training, power walking), and under 100 BPM are best for low intensity workouts (yoga/flexibility, swimming) and warm up/cool down cycles. The BPM does not have to impact the vibe - as we've seen, there are some great sub-100 songs that are perfect for pushing you during a work out. My recommendation is to order your playlist (if possible - if you're using the free version of Spotify, random is mandatory on the app) in a way so that you use the lower BPM in your warm up and cool down phases, then move gradually between moderate intensity and/or high intensity songs, depending on what your needs are. 
4. Limit the list to two songs per artist. This is one of those arbitrary rules that I've found just works in reality. If you love an artist, one song is too little but three songs makes it seem like the playlist only has that artist. I don't know why that happens, it just does. Variety is the spice of life and when you are trying to limit how long the playlist is, these arbitrary rules pay off in the long run. Limiting an artist to only two songs requires you to get really picky on which songs truly fit your theme and vibe for playlist. You start to notice little things about the songs - for instance, maybe a particular lyric hits you harder than you realized or the background music is just a tad slower than you want for the mix. In finding that perfect song by your favorite artist for your go-to playlist, you'll discover songs you never knew existed. More than likely, the artist you love to hear on the radio is way more prolific than the 2 or 3 singles they put out a year. So go ahead and explore. Your ears will thank you.
5. Edit, Edit, Edit. It happens - you don't always get a playlist right the first time. Sometimes, after listening through once or twice, you realize a song that you absolutely love just doesn't fit. That's okay. Kill your darlings....or at least move them to a playlist where they fit better. You don't have to put all your favorite songs on a playlist - I've done that and it is an emotional roller coaster not for the faint of heart. If you find yourself skipping a song a lot on a playlist, that's a good indicator that it may not belong there. Likewise, it's normal to get bored, especially if you have a "go-to" playlist that you're always listening to. It's okay to remove songs as they get overplayed and add new ones as you discover them. There's a reason why music apps (like Spotify and Pandora) have a "like" button - it's so you can find those songs again when you want to. I also recommend using this button liberally when you're listening to playlists made by other people or by the app company, as this is a great way to discover new music, even if you don't have a plan for it yet.
6. Know your limits (even if you don't think you need them). This is the master rule to remember when creating a playlist. Sure, maybe you don't have a song limit. Maybe you're not going to exclude genres from your list. Maybe you don't have a desired song length. That's all well and good, but in practice, you'll know when you've strayed because you just don't enjoy listening to the playlist anymore. Always remember what your original intention was. Always consider whether or not the playlist is meeting your needs and act accordingly. Sometimes that means you have to start over. Playlist creation is an art and, like all good art, you get better by doing. So if you don't what your limits are, what arbitrary rules you have for your own playlists, I recommend going out and breaking some eggs until you find what works. 

And that's it. I hope these tips are helpful and informative - now go have some fun!

April Theme: "Why are you running?"

Ah yes, the quintessential question of human existence, except for maybe it's sister question - "What are you running from?" Of course, I'm not talking about running from your problems or your angst or any of that nonsense. I'm talking about just regular, one-foot-in-front-of-the-other running. In my youth, I was asked this question a lot. A friend in college told me once that every time she saw me, I was always running. Running to do this. Running to do that. Running here. Running there. The simple truth of the matter is that I simply cannot stand still. I'm convinced that if I stop running, I'll die and there's plenty of scientific evidence to back me up. Unfortunately, I'm actually supposed to take a break from running for a couple weeks because I've been - literally - running myself ragged. So, as much as I'll miss my favorite form of moving meditation, I'll be focusing on more low impact exercise (like yoga) for now in order to give my poor body some time to recover.

As for the theme, I've chosen a selection of my favorite songs to run to and I'll be describing the sort of places my imagination goes when I only have a stretch of road and my music to keep me company. Most of these songs are featured on my "Working Out or Hardly Working?" playlist on Spotify, which brings me to my next point. Later in the month, I will be sharing my secrets to curating a killer playlist for fun and profit. I've been making mix tapes since I was 8, so hopefully I've learned a thing or two about how to keep the tunes flowing in the most effective manner. Just a fair warning - there is a lot of "epic" music ahead for this month, along with probably way too much Imagine Dragons. As a pre-apology, enjoy the following "Heart and Brain" comic:

Bonfire Night!

Today happens to be May 1st and, as I'll have you know, it happens to be my favorite of all the pagan festivals.  It celebrates the return of the Sun and the rejuvenation of life all over the planet. Bealtaine (pronounced byol-tinnuh -- it's Gaelic and, weirdly enough, I can actually sort of see where they get that pronunciation) is an ancient fertility ritual that falls every year on May 1st or when the sun is at 15 degrees Taurus.  That last part only matters if you have any fucking clue how to read astrological tables--which I don't.  Oh, and this only applies in the Northern Hemisphere--if you live in Australia, you'd be trick-or-treating.  Traditionally--or, at least, according to the Internet--this Sabbat is celebrated by dancing naked around a fire and then running off and having sex.  Unfortunately, the  latter option is an impossibility for me (what with The Boyfriend being 310 miles away and all) and dancing naked around a bonfire by yourself is just plain sad.  That doesn't mean I don't enjoy a good heathen dancing circle every once in a while -- just call me your friendly neighborhood heathen sun-worshipper!  Anyway, as a special treat, I've composed a short list of songs that make me want to dance like a wild woman, preferrably around a blazing fire, clothing optional mais bien sur.  In the meantime, I'll be a good girl and celebrate in rather tame fashion by planting an herb garden and some flowers and applying tons of sunblock because no one is happier than me that the good running weather is back!

5.  "Eyes Like Yours (Ojos Asi)" by Shakira -- I love Middle-Eastern influence in music and during the bridge of this song -- in both Spanish and English versions -- Shakira busts out in Arabic chants.  And Arabic chants are fuckin' great for Crazy-Girl-Dancing-Alone-In-Her-Room time.  I'm posting the English version but the Spanish version is easily searchable on Youtube.

4. "Shake It Out" by Florence + the Machine -- Aside from this being my cure for a crappy day, this song just wants to make you move and feel happy.  I challenge you to listen to this song and not find yourself flailing about wildly -- dare I say, in the throes of ecstasy --to the drumbeats and tambourine jingling.  And if you succeed, it is fairly possible that you don't have a soul.

5 Great Zombie-Related Songs

Are you ready for the zombie apocalypse?  Apparently, according to the CDC, Americans are horribly under-prepared for such a contingency.  To ameliorate this issue, The Boyfriend and his friends (with technical support -- which means the actual event planning and website creation --provided by myself) have planned a Zombie Apocalypse Drill for sometime next spring.  Why next spring instead of right now?  Elementary, Dear Watson!  We're all broke and to be prepared for basically TEOTWAWKI  (acronym for "The End of the World as We Know It" in SurvivorMan speak), we need to acquire the essentials needed for fleeing civilized society.  I've interpreted this as First Aid Kits, camping gear, and honing the necessary survival skills and fitness levels; my male counterparts have focused on the weaponry aspect:  Swords, crossbows, guns, and -- my personal choice -- ninja throwing stars. 

They took away her iPod...Poor thing...

The Zombie Apocalypse is just about everyone's favorite Worst Case Scenario -- mostly because the possibility of it actually happening is slim to zilch.  Everybody has their own plan -- you've heard of the Wal-Mart forts, the fortified shopping malls, the extra homes in Freeze-Your-Ass-Off, Saskatchewan, and the High-Tech McMansions with their Titanium Gates of Flaming Awesomeness.  Personally, I would take the Keep On Moving approach but that's because I don't have children and the people I love are in more-or-less good physical condition.  My question is, though --Does everyone have their own playlist?  I didn't think so....but fret not-- I am here to help.  I'll keep updating on the Zombie Drill situation until it actually happens and will be periodically adding to this playlist but I thought it would be best to start on a solid foundation of zombie-themed songs.  Just 5 for today and, hopefully, they won't be the ones you expected.  Remember:  Even during the Zombie Takeover, the element of surprise is your greatest asset.  Unless the zombies can run.  Then we're all royally f*cked.

The Salle-de-Bain Cabaret

I'm trying to make this blog a little more personal -- not all news stories and song recommendations -- and the way I plan to do that is to let you in on my uber-fascinating life with information like ::BA BA BA!!!:: I love to sing.  I sang in some choir or another since I was 9 up until I left high school.  Oh yes, I was a Gleek before Gleek was even a word (I haven't watched the show, but Leah Michelle or whatever her name is annoys the hell out of me....almost as much as Kyra Sedgewick).  I even achieved a letter--like for a letterman jacket -- and was awarded Outstanding Alto as well as being chosen to sing in the Regional Choir.  I was hardcore into it -- I did musicals (although I was usually cast for my acting ability rather than my singing -- El Paso had some really fierce singers when I was in high school) and competed in Solo & Ensemble and all that jazz.  For a long time, my life revolved around Theatre and Choir to the point where I spent 12-14 hours out of the day at school--in fact, the only reason I got straight As was so that I could remain eligible (I'm one of those people who had to exert practically no effort to get good grades....I know....don't hate me because I'm smart.)  That's just how I roll.

Anyway, I still sing, although mostly it's in the shower (You know what they say...some people sing in the shower, the rest...take care of business).  Sometimes I sing while I run, but I don't recommend it--Proper breathing to sing conflicts with the need to continue breathing while running.  For Today, I've prepared for you a list of my favorite songs to belt out while I'm sudsing up.  In high school, I was classified as an Alto 1, which is considered Mezzo-soprano in Opera-speak, so the songs will reflect that. 

• Criminal by Fiona Apple -- Fiona Apple is my go-to songstress whenever I have a life-crisis, which is about every year in October for some reason.  Seriously -- my first year of college, I chopped off my hair to chin-length and made it a point to damp out a match with my tongue like she does at the end of the "Fast as you can" video.  I love her deep voice and I actually sing this song pretty well at kaoroke.

• Defying Gravity from Wicked - Wicked is one of my favorite musicals and one of the top 5 I would like to star in if I ever had the chance.  I recently saw it in Tucson, but the enjoyment was a little ruined by the news that my congresswoman, Gabrielle Giffords, was shot, along with the 6 other fatalities.  This song is wonderful and another one of those songs that pumps me up and makes me forget how uneventful my life has become.

Fuel for 6-Mile Treks across the Desert

There are few days when I'm as exhausted as I am today.  I had to wake up at 5am to take my dad to the airport which is -- you guessed it -- just under 2 hours away.  That, and I couldn't sleep because I've been reading about serial killers and my unconscious mind was serving me up platters of cryptic nightmares last night.  Fun stuff.  Anyway, most of my days are filled with working on The Novel, the unending-and-fruitless job search most college graduates are going through, facebook stalking old friends, and running ridiculous distances.  I am a big runner -- it's my zen time.  It's my time to tune out the world with some daydreams and thoroughly wear myself out with physical exertion.  Thus, it has become borderline impossible for me to run without my iPod.  Nope, can't do it -- running without music is weird and almost pointless from where I'm standing.  Among other things, it motivates me to run faster and harder and it provides welcome accompaniment to my imaginings, which are always in the back of my mind.  Thus, I've picked a playlist of my favorite songs to run to -- from upbeat dance tunes to kickass power ballads -- that keep me going when running 6 miles in the Arizona heat is the last thing I want to do.  I run about an 8-minute mile so this list lasts roughly 50 minutes.

• "Too Young" Pheonix -- I love Pheonix but this song in particular never fails to energize me.  You may remember it from that scene in "Shallow Hal" when Jack Black is whipping out his meth-addict dance moves with three "ugly" girls.  I'll admit, it's hard not to dance like that to this song -- reminiscent of disco but with better lyrics.  Favorite line:  "I guess I couldn't live without things/that made my life what it is."  True story.

• "American Boy" Estelle w/ Kanye West -- Another tune that gets me pumped up.  Estelle is amazing if you've never heard any of her other stuff.  And Kanye -- despite his increasingly asshole-celebrity public antics -- can write a good rap.  And this one is, for the most part, free of obscenities. (personally, I think if you need to say "f*ck" every other word, you lack linguistic creativity -- and that's from someone who has an incredibly foul mouth.)

I wonder what's on Snape's iPod...

I saw this link on my twitter feed and I had to share it.  The article combines two of my greatest passions -- Harry Potter and music.  And the playlists are pretty spot on and well-composed.  Lovin' it.
Read it at Songs of the Sorting Hat.