"Call Me" by Blondie

International Whores' Day was on June 2nd - I meant to write something then but I've had a lot on my mind and it was also around the time everything started blowing up in the United States. Now that things have died down a bit, I'm using my small platform to elevate awareness and promote advocacy for a cause I believe in. My stance is sex work is work and, unlike a lot of feminist theory, I do not think every sex worker is a victim who needs to be rescued or that sex work is inherently degrading. That position is paternalistic and causes more harm than good. I believe true feminism is allowing everyone the right to make their own choices. For those people who did not choose sex work willingly, absolutely we should help them get out and punish sex traffickers. However, for those who do choose to perform sex work, our aim should be in making it as safe as possible for them to do their job, which includes making legislation that affirms their right to bodily autonomy, financial and legal sovereignty, and - most of all - dignity and respect in public forums. And, yes, this issue affects men, too, albeit to a lesser extent and in a different context. Ladies, the Chippendale's dancers you enjoy so much, the models in Playgirl, and your favorite pornstar - those men are sex workers and sex worker advocacy supports them, too.

Call me (call me) on the line

Call me, call me any, anytime

Call me (call me) I'll arrive

You can call me any day or night

Call me

That's the thing the current legislation doesn't take into account - it treats sex work and the community as a monolith, with no room for diversity and a somewhat puritanical view of what "sex work" is and who engages in it. For example, if you conjure an image of a sex worker in your mind, most people probably aren't picturing an upper-middle-class college-educated 40-year-old woman who has an independent business as an escort or a student/cosplayer who sells nudes on SnapChat or the burlesque performer whose show you saw on your last trip to Vegas - but the sex work community includes all those people. Likewise, your internalized image of someone who purchases sex work services is probably pretty narrow - you may have a picture of awkward, desperate virgins or slimy politicians abusing their power and access. However, it should be noted that a lot of sex work clients may have disabilities that make it difficult to find a willing partner. And for those who have trauma or fear around sexual experiences, sex workers can be a vital resource if those people choose to go to a sex therapist (to be clear, the therapist is not a sex worker but may work with trusted sex workers if clients want to attempt practical application of partnered therapeutic techniques, without the requirement of a long-term romantic partner). BTW if the sex work client you're picturing is someone who calls themselves an "incel" (i.e., involuntary celibate), you are way off on who purchases sex work services. Incels have a medieval view of women and believe women owe them sex - which makes sex workers lower than dirt in their book (because how dare women charge them for something they should be getting for free!) To sum up this portion of my rant, sex workers fulfill an important economic purpose and, in order to make the market safe for both sex workers and their clients, we need to widen our view of sex work's place in society.

Cover me with kisses, baby

Cover me with love

Roll me in designer sheets

I'll never get enough

Emotions come, I don't know why

Cover up love's alibi

I mentioned a lot of crazy stuff was starting in the beginning of June, most of which have had major impacts on the sex work community. It was recently confirmed that a serial killer was active in the Seattle, WA, area. Sex workers are a common target for serial killers due to their marginalized status - they assume that, because of their profession, the disappearance of these men and women is less likely to be noticed and receive media attention. Unfortunately, their gamble is often correct - sex workers who become victims of serial killers aren't usually discovered as a victim until either their body is found or the police start linking the circumstances of a higher-profile victim to other disappearances in the area. Sex workers - especially those who identify as POC and transgendered - are at more risk for random violence and theft. Crimes they often either don't report, because they're more likely to be picked up on criminal charges, or are unlikely to be resolved if they are reported. The pandemic has been harder on sex workers due to social distancing restrictions and the draconian measures in SESTA-FOSTA make it difficult for them to shift from in-person transactions to online ones. And let's not avoid the elephant in the room - the Jeffery Epstein case gets more disturbing every time more information comes out. And the most disturbing thing about this case is the number of wealthy, powerful people who may have known about his sex trafficking and did absolutely nothing for decades. The elite pools of Washington D.C. and New York City are very shallow and he had connections with practically everyone. A podcast I was listening to brought up philosopher Hannah Arendt's theory on the banality of evil and it definitely applies here. The theory goes that most people aren't actually evil; however, evil persists because either people are unaware of their complicity or they are aware and they don't care because it doesn't directly affect them. As we move forward into the so-called Age of Aquarius, this theory is going to become more prescient in people's minds. Especially as we're approaching an election season where voters are being asked to choose (yet again) the lesser of two evils - and how people come to the conclusion of which is the lesser is also problematic.

Oooh, he speaks the languages of love

Oooh, amore, chiamami, chiamami

Oooh, appelle-moi mon cherie, appelle-moi

Anytime, anyplace, anywhere, any way

Anytime, anyplace, anywhere, any day, any way

Given that the fuel for evil is ignorance and apathy, I believe sunlight is the best antidote. Decriminalization allows space for sex workers to be more open about the issues they face. Less stigma and secrecy also increases the safety of transactions for them and their clients, while simultaneously making it harder for sex trafficking operations to persist under the radar. There's an argument to be made that, without the threat of being arrested, trafficking victims will more readily come forward to get the help they need and identify those involved. I chose "Call Me" for today's song because it is very obviously about prostitution. It was featured as the theme for the movie "American Gigalo" (a "gigalo" is a somewhat old-fashioned name for a male prostitute) and it also inspired the title for a Heidi Fleiss biopic that came out on TV when I was younger. Some contemporary United States history for you - Heidi Fleiss was a madam who ran a high-class prostitution ring in Los Angeles, CA. She was caught in 1993 and convicted for tax evasion. Her client list was rumored to have a numerous wealthy, well-connected people on it and there was a pervasive fear in elite circles that she'd release her "little black book." The same fear - mind you - that has people keeping quiet about what they knew about Jeffery Epstein's operation. However, the women who worked for Heidi Fleiss were of legal age and were willingly recruited. It's been interesting to see the how differently the two cases are being treated, both in the media and by society at large.

I know - super heavy ponderings for a Friday night, so I'll leave you with a fun astrological fact - Debbie Harry, lead singer of "Blondie," is a Cancer. She recently celebrated her 75th birthday this past July 1st.

COVID-19 Update: Still a little stir crazy. Combined with everything that's been on my mind, I've been a bit mentally exhausted (which is worse than physical exhaustion, in my opinion). I've been taking walks early in the morning, before the sun comes up, for exercise and an opportunity to get some alone time. My neighborhood basically has no streetlights but, on the plus side, the reduced light pollution means I was actually able to see a few shooting stars this week. We're in the middle of the Leonid meteor shower that occurs every Leo season. I also walked away from my doctor's appointment yesterday a lot more comfortable and secure regarding my birth options. I was nervous about this conversation, because my doctor is friendly but I wouldn't characterize her as a warm person. But then again, I'm sure I come off that way most of the time, too. Anyway, she seemed very supportive, knowledgeable, and comfortable with whatever my ultimate decision would be and we're both on the same page - hope for the best, do what you can to make the desired outcome possible, but prepare for the less desirable option, just in case. Jupiter in Capricorn, baby - following well-designed plans equal success and good fortune.

"Call Me" Video