Finishing September with an epic song by the formidable Nightwish. I'm going to keep it short, since I had a lengthy early morning rant.
"Storytime" encompasses the spirit of imagination. Every feeling, every thought, every memory goes into Creation, which lives in the human imagination. Children understand this but - with the indoctrination into societal norms like ultra-productivity and competitiveness - it gets beaten out of them until they become the husks that we call adults. Being able to see beauty and magic in the world is so important to a person's well-being. That seems so obvious, but it's really something we're just barely being able to understand in psychological studies of happiness. I think it might be safe to say that an hour of creativity and daydreaming a day keeps the psychiatrist away. Not that there's anything wrong with seeing a psychiatrist if you need to. But the majority of mental illness treated in the United States is stress and anxiety-related, mostly because we're working too hard and not spending enough time doing anything fulfilling. And by fulfilling, I mean something you get excited to do. Like reading a book or painting a picture. Cooking or baking a special meal to share with loved ones. Dancing or singing with your children. Spending time with friends. We haven't forgotten how to do these things, we just don't make the time to do them like we did when we were younger. But it's never too late to start....
I am the voice of never, never land
The innocence, the dreams of every man
I am the empty crib of Peter Pan
A soaring kite against the blue, blue sky
Every chimney, every moonlit sight
I am the story that will read you real
Every memory that you hold dear
For those who are unfamiliar, Nightwish is a metal band from Finland. They incorporate symphonic elements into their music, which makes all their music sound epic. They are female-fronted and have had three lead singers to date. The singer on "Storytime" is Anette Olzen, but the current lead is Floor Jansen (gotta love these Finnish names). As for the content of their music, they tend to focus on fantasy and mythological influences and have taken inspiration from "The Lord of the Rings," the Dark Tower series by Stephen King, and various Disney fairy tales. They also have an amazing rendition of the theme from "Phantom of the Opera," which is a personal favorite of mine.
Did you really think I'd end this month without a song from "Beauty & the Beast?" Oh, foolishness! That was never going to happen. I meant to write this yesterday but I took a nap with the baby instead....so I'm going to do two songs today. Gotta finish strong, ya know?
Unless you've seen the Broadway play, you're probably unfamiliar with "Home." I discovered it when Vee was going through her Disney phase and she was buying all the Disney song compilation CDs. I fell in love with it. Coincidentally, this was also around the time my parents forced me to move from El Paso to Arizona right before my senior year of high school. I was overly dramatic. I begged them to let me live with my best friend in El Paso so I could finish high school (which is what they did for M....they let her stay in ABQ all four years of high school). When they refused, I screamed "fine, well let me start packing" and then, in a tearful rage, I pulled all the books off my bookshelf. Once I got there, it wasn't so terrible. I made a few friends in drama class and made it through the year relatively unscathed. And, it's actually easier to graduate in Arizona, because there's less mandatory classes. I had enough free time to take two electives my senior year, so I didn't have to choose between taking Theatre or Choir (I would've chosen Theatre, hands down, but I would've missed having an excuse to sing every day). Still, I missed my El Paso friends - especially Rae and Sunshine - and I was so happy whenever they visited, which they did for every play I was in.
Is this home?
Am I here for a day or forever?
Shut away
From the world until who knows when
Oh, but then
As my life has been altered once
It can change again
Build higher walls around me
Change every lock and key
Nothing lasts
Nothing holds all of me
"Beauty & the Beast" is my favorite Disney film, mostly because of Belle. I always thought I was a lot like Belle. Always reading, always dreaming of being somewhere better than where I was stuck. "And for once it might be grand to have someone understand I want so much more than they have planned." A great lyric and so true. I still want so much more, but it's not always as easy. But I learned a long time ago....I'm like water, I make my own path (like Sayuri in "Memoirs of a Geisha"). If I want something, I'm going to get it, no matter how long it takes. Like Belle says in the above lyrics, nothing holds all of me. Alright, that's enough ranting about me today, let's talk about the fairy tale.
"Beauty and the Beast" by French novelist, Gabrielle-Suzanne Barbot de Villaneuve, but the version we're familiar with was shortened by Andrew Lang. It's based on various similar stories that were told across Europe. In the original, Belle was the youngest of three daughters, and was the most beautiful, well-read, and uncommonly kind, whereas the others were wicked and cruel. Their father goes on a sales trip and asks what presents to bring back. His sons and eldest daughters ask for riches and fine clothing, but Belle simply asks for him to stay safe and, if he must get her gift, bring her a rose because they don't grow in their part of the country. On the father's way back from his trip, he gets lost and seeks shelter in a palace. The Master graciously provides him shelter for one night. But, on his way out, the father sees a rose garden and picks a rose for Belle. The Beast, angered that the man would do such a thing after being given hospitality. The man begs for his life, pleading that it was just a gift for his daughter, and the Beast says he may go but he has to send back one of his daughters in return. The father agrees. He tries to hide his deal from his children, but Belle discovers it and choose to go.
When she arrives, the Beast informs her that she is now the Mistress of the castle and he is her servant. He gives her riches and beautiful clothes and entertains her at length. Every night, he asks Belle to marry him, but she refuses. At night, she dreams of a handsome prince, who pleads for her to tell him why she will not marry the Beast. She says that it is because she only loves him as a friend, not realizing that the handsome prince and the Beast are the same. She becomes convinced that the Beast is holding the prince captive and searches the palace but never finds him. Belle lives in the palace for several months but eventually begins to miss her family and requests to visit them. The Beast agrees but she must return within a week. He sends her with a magic mirror that allows her to see the Beast and a ring that will return her back to the castle within an instant. At the end of a week, she is preparing to return. Belle's sisters plot to make Belle break her promise and, using an onion to create tears, beg Belle to stay just one more day. Moved by their false love, she agrees but she feels guilty about breaking her promise to the Beast. Belle uses the mirror to view the Beast and sees him half-dead from heartbreak in the rose garden. She uses the ring to return to him. Belle weeps over him and declares that she loves him, and her tears transform him back into a handsome prince. He tells her of the curse a fairy placed on him, to remain a Beast until he found True Love. They marry and live happily ever after.
Well, it's finally Friday. It was a rough Friday and I am good and drunk. As all great writers were, for some reason or another. I think it's easier to deal with the pain that way. I hardly feel anything right now. But I do feel sad. And lonely. And a little broken. But I've always been a little broken, so what else is new? I think the saying goes, "Beer before liquor, never been sicker...but gin before night, sailor's delight." Or something. If I wake up and it looks like I was bashing my head against the keyboard, I'll know which one it was.
I sought out this song, because I loved the story. I saw it on an episode of "Charmed," one of the few episodes I watched and remembered really well, because it's one of those tragic love stories I love so much. I think the original tale has a Native American origin and sometimes the animal roles are reversed but I'll try to re-tell it as best I can.
Once upon a time, there was a pair of lovers who was cursed by an evil sorcerer. The woman was very beautiful and refused the sorcerer's advances, so she cursed her and her True Love to live life apart. She would life as an owl during the daytime and he would live life as a wolf during the night. They would never both be human at the same time until there was a night within a day. The only thing that would break the curse was True Love's Kiss but neither of them were human for long enough. They would spend their days and nights alone but at each sunset and sunrise, they would find each other, just to catch a glimpse. Just for a second before their owl or wolf eyes returned. Every day, twice a day, but it was worth it. It was worth the wait, every time. Then, finally, the answer to their prayers arrived - a solar eclipse. The sorcerer tried to keep them apart but they found their way to each other. And for the last minute of the eclipse, they were together long enough to break the curse. And, supposedly, they lived happily ever after.
We sing song of our midnight glamour
Our eyes illuminate in high and low"
I set the fire on the black hole's gates
To keep us holding on until the day light breaks
We are the stealer of the stars tonight
The moral of the story is that Love persists, no matter what obstacles are thrown in the way. One must have Faith to reach their Happily Every After. What would have happened if the Owl and the Wolf chose to stop trying to find each other ever sunset and sunrise? Would they have been stuck in this purgatory forever? No one knows, because their love never died and neither did their hope. It wouldn't have been as good a story if the ending was "they each moved on with their lives after accepting that this was how things were going to be until they died." Not as good a story, but it would be understandable. At least they didn't choose a suicide pact - instead, they accepted that they'd have to be alone forever except for a moment each day. It's almost sadder that way, though, in my opinion.
The SIGIT are an Indonesian rock band who was influenced by the artists of the 1970s. Apparently, they do a lot of covers of Led Zeppelin. I can respect that. "Owl and Wolf" is from their last album, "Detourn," which came out in 2013. I didn't know what to expect when I searched out the song but I'm happy with what I found. It's as sweet and soft as the story that it's based on, and listening to it is calming me down somewhat.
Today's my older sister's birthday so I thought I'd choose something by one of her favorite bands. My choices were Metallica or Dave Matthews Band, and it will be a cold day in Hell before I choose something by Dave Matthews Band (if you like DMB, I'm judging you....harshly). There's this funny scene in "Parks and Rec" where April and Andy are telling Chris Traeger things to even out his mood swings. Andy is telling him happy things to bring him up (e.g., puppies) and April is telling him sad things to bring him down (e.g., botched surgery). At the end, Andy says Dave Matthews Band (because that's his favorite band) and April also says Dave Matthews Band (because she thinks they suck, like a normal person). It's a pretty great moment....I tried to find the clip but I couldn't find it outside of a compilation so I settled for a gif.
Anyway, M also likes Metallica and the most fairytale-related song I could find was "Enter Sandman," a classic. We occasionally sung this song to the baby when he was smaller and he would knock out instantly when he heard it. I told you - that kid is more hardcore than you or I will ever be. He plays hard and sleeps even harder.
The Sandman is a mythological character in European folklore. As you're probably aware, he is said to put people to sleep and bring them good dreams by sprinkling dust in their eyes, which explains where morning eye crusties come from. The Sandman is most prominently seen in Northern European cultures, with the oldest stories having Scandinavian and Germanic origins. The German version was more hostile - he would throw his magical dust into the eyes of children who refused to sleep so hard that their eyes would fall out. He would then collect the eyes and feed them to his children. Pretty gross. The version that most people are familiar with most likely is based on a story by our old friend, Hans Christian Andersen, who wrote "Ole Lukoje." In this version, the Sandman just prevents the naughty children from having dreams at all, which doesn't sound too terrible.
Of course, everybody dreams at night. It's your mind processing the information into long-term memory or working out problems while you sleep. Unfortunately, you only remember dreams if you're woken up immediately after having one, which generally doesn't happen if your sleep is sufficiently restful. So...maybe it's a good thing if you don't remember your dreams? I wish I did more often, though. Sleep science always interested me during my psychology studies, especially the dream interpretation stuff. The Founding Fathers of Psychology, Sigmund Freud and Carl Jung, put a lot of weight on dream interpretation and incorporated it into their psychoanalytic methods. Today, dream interpretation is considered pseudoscience, at best, and a lot of the dream meanings you find out there are either loosely based on historical/cultural interpretations or completely made. However, I think it can be helpful to look up the symbology of things and see if they apply to your life in some way. Introspection is always a good thing, in my book.
Something's wrong, shut the light
Heavy thoughts tonight
And they aren't of Snow White
Dreams of war
Dreams of liars
Dreams of dragons fire
And of things that will bite, yeah
As I said, "Enter Sandman" is a classic. There's not much to the meaning - the lyrics recount the nightmares of childhood and combine it some awesome guitar riffs. The bridge features the prayer, "Now I Lay Me Down to Sleep," which is a prayer my very Italian Catholic grandmother made us say before bed when we visited her. I always found it disturbing - "if I die before I wake, I pray the Lord my soul to take." What the fuck?! Yep, that's definitely something 10-year-old me wanted to be worrying about before I fell asleep. Shit, I was already thinking about dying during my waking hours, now I have to ask God to take my soul if I happen to die while I'm sleeping? Doesn't (s)he do that already, no questions asked? Coincidentally, when we stayed at her house, my sister and I always slept in a room that faced the backyard and I swear I could hear someone digging every night. I imagined it was the Grim Reaper digging our graves and if we looked outside to see what was making that sound, we would die. Yep, my imagination is very vivid and it's not all rainbows and uni-kitties.
The story of the frog prince is one that is seen in a lot of stories. Maybe the prince isn't turned into a frog - sometimes he's turned into a beast, a wolf, a bird - any animal. And he has to convince some beautiful maiden or princess to fall in love with him or perform True Love's kiss in order to return him to his original, magnificent form. But what happens after the kiss? We assume they live happily every after, because that's how fairy tales are supposed to end. Sometimes, it's more complicated than that.
Keane's "The Frog Prince" addresses that unhappily ever after. The Frog Prince is now the ruler of a whole kingdom and it's much less than he imagined it would be. He misses the simpler things, like when he was a frog. The softness of the lily pad he used to sit on. The crunch of a particularly delicious fly. And now, he feels himself turning into something...someone he doesn't recognize. The irony is that, before he was cursed to live life as a frog, he enjoyed all the trappings of being king. Isn't that why he was cursed?! Because he was arrogant and extravagant and unkind (that's usually the reason). But that's what the song is about - once an experience changes you, you can't go back to being the person you were before. You can deny it happened, you can try to forget, you can be sad about it, but you can't go back to how things used to be.
All promises broken
Feed your people or lose your throne
And forfeit your whole kingdom
I'd sooner lose it than still live in it alone
There's a Russian version of this where the roles are reversed called "The Frog Princess." A king wants his three sons to find brides so he has them each shoot an arrow and tells them that where the arrows landed, they will find their brides. The two elder brothers' arrows land at the houses of wealthy merchants, but the third brother's arrow is picked up by a frog who turns into a princess at night (this might sound familiar....it's the inspiration for Fiona in "Shrek"). The princess is Vasilisa the Wise, who is beautiful, kind, intelligent, hardworking, and talented at every task she undertakes. She has been punished for disobeying Koschei and must live as a frog during the day for three years. Koschei the Deathless is an interesting cat, he's a kind of lich that likes to steal men's wives. Not surprisingly, he gets mad when fair maidens turn down his advances. Anyway, the three brothers take their prospective brides home. The king, to test that his son's have found good wives, decides to test them. In every test, the Frog Princess outperforms the other two brides at every task. The third prince marries her but he's still disgusted that she turns into a frog. But, at the end of three years, she remains a princess for good. Supposedly, they live happily ever after but I wouldn't be very happy being married to a man who didn't want to be married to me while I was going through a rough time, as Vasilisa undoubtedly was.
The video is below. I was feeling a little uninspired but I'm glad I forced myself to write. Hopefully y'all enjoyed it, too.
I've been trying my best to avoid Disney movie songs this month, even though it would be easier. However, I'm feeling a little sentimental and romantic today, so I watched "Tangled" with my son this morning. I think it's a beautiful movie and the changes they made to the story of Rapunzel enhanced it and made it better, in my opinion. The scene where they sing "I See the Light" is pretty amazing. When all the lanterns are released into the sky is one of those feats of 3D animation that leaves you in awe - another good example is when Miguel first enters the Land of the Dead in "Coco." So much work goes into just one single frame, but when a kid sees it, all they see is the beauty of it all. The lights, the reflection on the water, the exact color of the sky at twilight. To quote Professor Slughorn, it is "beautiful magic, wondrous to behold."
Rapunzel is one of those classic stories I remember my dad reading to us when I was little. Laying on the bed, listening to his voice while looking at the illustrations in our copy of Grimm's Fairy Tales. It's a little different from the story in "Tangled." Rapunzel's parents are not royalty, but a simple farmer and his wife. And the wife had a killer craving for cabbages while she was pregnant, so much so that her loving husband stole cabbages from a witch's garden. When the witch catches him, he begs for mercy and they make a deal that he can take as much cabbage as he wants. But, in return, the witch will take the baby when it is born and raise it as her own. Because the girl is so beautiful when she reaches her teen years, the witch locks her up in a tower with no stairs and no door, instead using Rapunzel's long golden hair as a ladder.
One day, a prince hears Rapunzel singing and falls in love. She draws him up with her hair and they form a plan - the prince will bring strips of fabric with each visit so that Rapunzel can weave a real ladder. Eventually, the witch finds out and cuts Rapunzel's hair. In some versions of the story, she finds out because Rapunzel is visibly pregnant; in others, Rapunzel lets slip that the prince has been visiting her. However the witch finds out, she casts Rapunzel out into the wilderness and the next time the prince visits, the witch lures him in with Rapunzel's severed hair and blinds him. The prince wanders the world, blind, until he hears Rapunzel's voice again. He falls into her arms and her tears restore his sight. Afterwards, they live together in the cabin Rapunzel has built, with the twins that she bore him after she was cast out of the tower.
All those days chasing down a daydream
All those years living in a blur
All that time never truly seeing
Things, the way they were
Now she's here shining in the starlight
Now she's here suddenly I know
If she's here it's crystal clear
I'm where I'm meant to go
The lyrics for this song are sweet. It's a duet where Rapunzel and Eugene are singing about how limited their worldview was until they met each other. Rapunzel, though she had books and paints and everything she could want, was isolated and trapped. Eugene, who has all the freedom he could've ever wanted, was chasing riches because he felt he lacked something. But together, they feel like they complete each other. Her unending kindness and hopefulness warms his heart, and his sureness and level-headed outlook makes her feel safe and secure. And it makes them want to be better for each other. I told you I was feeling sentimental.
Let's go back to the lantern thing. I love the lanterns - I totally understand why Rapunzel wanted to see them. For my hypothetical wedding, instead of rice or bubbles, I wanted to do lanterns. Because I wanted to have an evening wedding. I thought it was romantic, to get married under the stars. I try not to think of that hypothetical wedding, because I know it's never going to happen. But the lantern thing, I think that would be a really beautiful, special thing to do for a wedding. For Chinese New Year, there's a Lantern Festival on the last night and in some East Asian countries, they do big send-offs of floating lanterns to celebrate. That's something I would really like to see some day. For today's video, I'm featuring the scene from the movie.
I think this one would be good for October, too, since it's kind of creepy. The song is about Little Red Riding Hood, but from the point of view of the Big Bad Wolf. The Wolf is obsessed with Little Red, which is fitting. A literary analysis of Little Red Riding Hood reveals that, at the core of the story, it's a cautionary tale for young girls to be weary of strange men. The Big Bad Wolf represents the prototypical male stranger - hairy, big, maybe a little scary, with an insatiable hunger. I won't spell it out for you, but you know what that insatiable hunger is. And the song is full of those implications. In some retellings of the story, Little Red and her grandmother successfully fight off the wolf. But in others, they aren't saved until a noble Huntsman comes to the rescue. And in still others, no one escapes. This is how the original story by Charles Perrault ends - with Little Red climbing into bed with the Wolf and being consumed. The Big Bad Wolf wins, sometimes.
Fable Cry front man, Zach Ferrin, describes the arc of "Onion Grin" as an example of what unchecked romantic obsession can become. The lyrics follow the thought process of the Big Bad Wolf while he is stalking beautiful Little Red. She's walking alone at twilight when he spies her. He considers eating all the treats inside in her basket of goodies but it's "not enough." He approaches her and strikes up a conversation, slowly gaining her trust, even though she's only known him for a few seconds. As she's telling him everything he needs to get to her grandmother's house, he's devouring her with his eyes. Imagining what she tastes like. Finally, he captures her and she's struggling to escape. But by the end, he's gotten what he's been desiring. Yes, Fable Cry is describing the Wolf eating someone, but it sounds dangerously sensual. He's definitely eating her, but what part? I'll let you decide.
Tell me all your fears, dear, I can guess what they're all about
I whisper in your ear with an onion grin and a whiskered snout
The colour that's in your hair is on your lips, it's in the trees
It's in my heart, it's on my tongue, it's everything I see
Fable Cry describes their music as "scamp rock," which I imagine is in the same family as chap hop. Basically, they take instrumental and lyric inspiration from the Steampunk era and mix it with modern musical styles. I found their sound very similar to Aurelio Voltaire, and if I looked through more of their songs, I imagine some of them would be as dark as Voltaire's work, too. As with "Onion Grin," they draw the inspiration for their songs from mythological and fantastical sources, such as fairy tales. Fable Cry originated in Nashville, so their music tends to have some bluesy influences and sounds, like honky tonk pianos and banjos (I love both of these!). And when they perform, they dress like Victorian Goths...I'm totally okay with this. Every Fable Cry song I've heard sounds tailor-made for Halloween season, so don't be surprised if you hear from them again. Merry Mabon!
I love this cover of "As the World Falls Down." I already loved the original but Nina Garcia's voice makes it more beautiful somehow. Girl in a Coma (GiaC) have given it a harder, rock edge, too, that makes it seem almost more heavy-hearted. I've been feeling that way lately...just a little bit hollow, so I've been trying to do more things that make me happy. Like watching Meg Ryan movies and dancing with my son to my favorite songs. This - in case you're wondering - is one of my favorite songs. From one of my favorite movies. Written and sung by one of my favorite artists.
David Bowie was my first celebrity crush. Before Jonathan Taylor Thomas, before Elijah Wood, before Leo...there was Jareth, the Goblin King. True story - after I had my son, I did say the words. "I wish the Goblin King would take you away right now." Not because I wanted him to go away but just to see what would happen. To my chagrin, David Bowie did NOT, in fact, show up. Kind of disappointing but I'm over it. I told you - my imagination gets away from me sometimes. Personally, had I been Sarah in "Labyrinth," I probably would've stayed in that bubble dancing with David Bowie for eternity. It wouldn't have been as good a story, but I'd still be having a great time.
As the pain sweeps through,
Makes no sense for you
Every thrill is gone
Wasn't too much fun at all,
But I'll be there for you
As the world falls down
I consider "Labyrinth" one of the great fairy tales written in the modern era. It's not based on a book or an existing story - it's a wholly original creation of the late genius, Jim Henson. But it follows all the tropes. Beautiful girl, unhappy with life, relies on fantasy to get through tough times. Frustrated with her circumstances, she offers her baby brother up to the Goblin King and, to her surprise, the Goblin King obliges. Realizing she's made a terrible, selfish, irresponsible mistake, she travels into a fantastical world to save the baby. Along the way, she meets a diverse cast of characters and goes on wild adventures. In the end, she barely saves her baby brother in time and learns an important lesson about being happy with the life she has. And all this happens to the sounds of one of the best soundtracks ever created. I would say this soundtrack shaped a lot of my musical tastes - "Underground" is patently wonderful and uplifting. And if you don't find yourself dancing to "Magic Dance," you most definitely don't have a soul.
I'm including the GiaC version and the original, for comparison. The original is considerably longer. The GiaC version cuts out a lot of the fluffy repetition at the end of the original, which - you'll be surprised to know - I don't mind. I actually prefer it. GiaC has an entire album of covers, called "Adventures in Coverland," which I think is amazing and would highly recommend. Besides "As the World Falls Down," my favorites from the album are "As My Guitar Gently Weeps" and "Walkin' After Midnight," the latter of which is my go-to song for soothing my little boy.
I'm feeling a bit nostalgic, so I'm bringing back M2M. M2M was a pop duo from Norway and "Mirror Mirror" was big in 2000. Well, it felt like it was a big hit but I watched a lot of Disney channel, back when they were first starting to realize that marketing to pre-teens and teenagers could be lucrative. They also went on tour with Hanson that year and it was rumored that Marion Raven was dating Zac Hanson. Needless to say, I was super jealous (even though I was only 12 and had absolutely no chance of ever dating Zac Hanson). Seriously, the things I remember from my childhood. You don't have to tell me I'm a dork....I already know....
Mirrors have a lot of symbolism in literature, especially fairy tales. Most often, Mirrors unveil uncomfortable truths. For example, in "Snow White," the Magic Mirror reveals to the Evil Queen that she is not the fairest in the land, for her stepdaughter gets more beautiful every day and will soon surpass even the Queen's beauty. Mirrors can also function as a reflection of subconscious desires, as seen in Goethe's "Faust." While mirrors can denote wisdom and self-knowledge, they can also symbolize vanity and warn of the perils of too much self-regard. We see this in the myth of Narcissus, when he falls in love with the reflection of himself and drowns. But in fairy tales, mirrors - and magic mirrors especially - don't always reflect the truth. In "The Snow Queen" by Hans Christian Andersen, which is what "Frozen" is loosely based on, the mirror distorts everything that is reflected in it. Something that is beautiful will be shown as ugly and vice versa. In the story, the mirror shatters and pieces of it get into Kai's eyes and heart, and he turns bitter and cruel because the only thing he can see is lies and ugliness. Ultimately, Kai is returned to his former self when his True Love, Gerda, weeps over him, which burns away the splinters from the magic mirror.
Obviously, the song "Mirror Mirror" is drawing from the story of "Snow White." So here we go....another reason why I identify with Snow White is because I often thought of my mom as the Evil Queen. She used to spend over an hour getting ready, putting on a full face of makeup before leaving the house. And then, she would criticize me and my sisters for not being beautiful enough, as if it was a reflection on her. I often felt like I took the brunt of the criticism because I look the most like her, and I guess she didn't like what she saw. In all honesty, it fucked up my self-esteem something awful. Most of my adult life, I've tried to avoid the level of vanity that my mom embraced. I don't wear much make-up, I don't spend a lot on expensive beauty treatments...I just generally don't spend much time or money on myself, because I feel like it's selfish. I'm trying to get out of that mindset, because it's not. I do a million selfless things a day (or so it feels), so it won't kill anyone if I get a facial or a massage. Even so, I've gotten to a place where I like what I see in the mirror. I'm not perfect, but my reflection is someone I respect. Unlike poor M2M....
Why don't I like the girl I see
The one who's standing right in front of me
Why don't I think before I speak
I should have listened to that voice inside me
I must be stupid must be crazy must be out of my mind
To say the kind of things I said last night
It sounds like M2M (I'm just going to refer to them as a single entity, because it's easier) fucked up big time. She started a big fight with her boyfriend and he's not coming back. Inevitably, regret settles in and she's praying to the mirror to change what she's done, because she's disappointed in herself. Honestly, she says all she should've done is say "I'm sorry" and I don't understand why she can't pick up the phone to apologize now. She's moping instead of taking the appropriate action and, to be honest, I'm not sure I feel sorry for her. I always apologize when I'm wrong. Heck, I'll even apologize when I was right but said mean things. Because stubbornness and pride are probably the worst things for a relationship. Anyway, Marion Raven does look quite lovely in the video - very much like how I'd picture Snow White. Almost as lovely as Lily Collins in the film "Mirror, Mirror" but not quite. Even though the movie kind of sucked, Collins looked gorgeous in like every frame. Just another person I wished I looked like....
I had a devil of a time finding this song. I knew I wanted to write about it but I haven't heard it in a long time and the only lead I had is that I liked it on Spotify approximately two years ago. But I found it! Anyway, this song reminds me of mermaids but it only mentions them once. Mermaids - and their cousins, sirens, undines, and naiads, as in Greek mythology - are water spirits with the top half of a beautiful woman (or man) and a fish-like tail. Mermaids and their ilk are found in cultures across the world, from China to the British Isles to Northern Africa. Pirates sailing in the Caribbean even claimed they saw mermaids in the New World and brought those tales back, to enthrall the public, adding more mystery to an already mysterious place. Mermaids of all shades are a type of faery, a water elemental - depending on the type of mermaid, they are found in either fresh water (undines and naiads) or the ocean (sirens). Although they appear human-like, they lack a human soul and must acquire one by marrying a human in order to become Immortal.
"The Mermaid and the Prince" by Edmund Dulac
The most famous mermaid - "The Little Mermaid" by Hans Christian Andersen - has a fairly depressing ending. Instead of running away and marrying the prince, like we see in the Disney version, the Little Mermaid dies of a broken heart. You know the first part - she makes a bargain with a sea witch to sell her beautiful voice for a pair of human legs, and the chance to win a human soul by gaining the love of a human. But the legs, although they allow her to dance as no other can dance, are painful and feel like she's walking on knives all the time. And if she does not succeed in winning a human's love, she will die. Still, she drinks the potion the sea witch gives her and ascends to the human world. The prince finds her and the Little Mermaid becomes his favorite companion. But his parents insist that he marry a princess from a neighboring kingdom. He tells the Little Mermaid that he doesn't love the princess and that he can only love the temple girl who he believes saved him. The temple girl turns out to be the princess and he consents to the marriage. That night, the Little Mermaid can feel her heart breaking and knows that she will die in the morning. Her sisters arrive and give her a knife, telling her to kill the prince and let the blood drip on her feet - if she does this, she'll return to her mermaid form. However, she cannot bring herself to kill him and throws the knife into the sea. As the sun rises, her body dissolves into foam but angels grab her consciousness and bring her to heaven. For her selflessness, she is given the opportunity to earn a soul by doing good deeds for 300 years.
There is a ship
Its sails were like two hearts beating, and
Its pace was like two wrists pulsing…
To a compass that fell silent
At the sound of song
"Song for a Siren" almost sounds like it's sung by sirens. The way Jen Kingwell sings the word "again" at the end of the chorus is how I would imagine a siren's song to sound. That's one of the things I would wish for if I lived in a fairytale - the voice of a siren. I've had classical voice training and still feel as if I sound like shit when I sing. I've always wished I had an alluring voice, like Ariel from "The Little Mermaid." I used to not care too much - I did karaoke pretty often in high school and participated in choral competitions - I even had my own song in a school play! - but I had my friends to cheer me on. Oh well. My son likes my voice and he's the only one that really hears me sing anymore anyway. Again, one of those romantic ideas I got from watching too many movies, that people fall in love by hearing someone's voice. So fantastical...I let my imagination run away sometimes.
Let's break down the lyrics. I couldn't find any song discussions on the meaning, so I'm flying blind here. I think it's a sad love song, and the ship is a metaphor for a relationship. It's moving along, smoothly, seemingly of its own volition. And then it hits rocky seas but at first, it seems it can weather the rough waves. But then things get really bad and the crew begins to distrust each other. They want different things than what the captain wants. Things fall apart and the (relation)ship sinks. The last verse is a sad acceptance that the journey is over. Honestly, I didn't realize fairy tale songs were going to be so fucking depressing when I started this month. I've been trying to find some more chipper tunes but when I found myself looking at stuff by Nick Cave & the Bad Seeds, I realized I was in dark territory. Only a couple more weeks left - I'll keep searching but all I'm finding is gothic metal and pop songs about Cinderella - all of which are less than happy. Sticking to a theme has been harder than I thought it would be, but it has been an interesting experience.
As I mentioned yesterday, I've been spending a lot of time in the dark and twisty feels. For me, those feels always inevitably devolve into anger. Feeling angry is always better than feeling empty. I'm a very passionate person and also one that feels like you have to do something if you're feeling down. I've never been one of those people who mopes. In fact, that kind of annoys me. If you're feeling bad, do something about it. Have an adventure, get a massage, create something beautiful - anything is better than doing nothing. And I know anger is not the same thing as passion but it's a strong motivator to get you to do something your passionate about or pursue a goal/dream that, otherwise, you wouldn't. The science behind that - Anger is triggered in your hippocampus. Emotions triggered in this region of the brain - anger, lust, fear - are instinctual and not always logical. As such, you don't think too much about your actions in the heat of the moment, you just do what feels right. Given two seconds of thought, though, your cerebellum has time to catch up and you can make a more logical choice about what to do with those feelings, but that doesn't mean they aren't as potent anymore. Quite the opposite - now, you can harness them to do what needs to be done. Okay, here comes the woo-woo stuff, in epic rant form.
Halsey in the official "Castle" Video
Lately, I've been noticing how draining being around certain people can be and my gut reaction is to turn that negativity into anger. I'm rather empathic, so I tend to take on others' energy, or let people siphon off mine, if I don't do something to protect myself. And I'm not very good at doing protection magic. I ground and clear every day, but this doesn't have the same effect as actually doing good protection magic. I'll start off the day all bright and shiny but by the end, I'll be utterly depleted unless I do something that makes me happy - like looking at funny memes on Twitter, listening to music, or escaping for a few minutes to take a walk outside. I have an amethyst necklace that I wear some days (amethyst was used for protection talismans back in the olden days), which helps, but it doesn't go with everything. Silly reason, I know. I should probably get a ring. No one notices if a ring doesn't match your outfit. Anyway, I let people who don't care anything about me take away my inner peace and strength, and I shouldn't. Harnessing the anger makes me feel more powerful, because without, I'm weak. And I guess that's how I protect myself.
There's a couple of songs Halsey wrote that are amazing to listen to when I want to feel this power. One is absolutely perfect for the October theme, so you'll get that in a few weeks. The other one is "Castle." The lyrics are basically saying that she's tired of being weak, tired of people taking advantage of her, so she's going to take what she wants. She's all out of fucks to give and if people think she's cold and cruel, she's going to be cold and cruel. I've been getting to that point and I have these flashes, this feeling that I'd burn the world down if I could. Sometimes, I think I probably could, if I concentrated hard enough. It's kind of scary but also intoxicating. I told you - being angry is better than the alternative, which is to be defeated. But don't worry - I would be a wise and just Queen once I've rebuilt everything from the ashes.
Oh, all these minutes passing, sick of feeling used
If you wanna break these walls down, you’re gonna get bruised
Now my neck is open wide, begging for a fist around it
Already choking on my pride, so there's no use crying about it
"Castle" was used in the promos for "The Huntsman: Winter's War." "The Huntsman" is the sequel/prequel to "Snow White & the Huntsman" which, in my opinion, wasn't the greatest movie. Don't get me wrong - I love me some twisted fairytales, especially when it's a retelling of Snow White. However, as pretty as Kristen Stewart is, her acting style annoys me. I don't know how you can act without showing emotion, without being animated. Charlize Theron was perfectly cast as the Wicked Queen, to the point where I was hoping she'd win in the end. And, of course, Chris Hemsworth is beautiful and, as such, I didn't mind watching his portrayal as the Huntsman. I haven't seen "The Huntsman" yet, mostly because the first movie was pretty meh. However, the trailers made it seem interesting. There's a lot more Charlize Theron - which was probably a good plot choice - and they also added Jessica Chastain and Emily Blunt, both of whom are very talented. I think Emily Blunt is supposed to be The Ice Queen (like Elsa in "Frozen") and Jessica Chastain was another Huntsman and Chris Hemsworth love interest. There is probably a love triangle or quadrangle, but as I've said, I haven't seen it so that's just wild supposition on my part. (Note: I just read the plot summary - that is not what happens at all.) It might be worth watching once, just to say I did. There was an official video but it shortens the song by nearly two minutes. I really hate when they do that - if it was meant to be two minutes shorter, than the album version would be two minutes shorter. Instead, I'm including the Vevo video from the album release. Happy Saturday...Enjoy!
Snow White has always been one of my favorite fairy tales. It's a classic and you can't beat a classic. In my head, I sort of identify with Snow White, especially when growing up. When I was younger, my grandmother often said I reminded her of Snow White - I was always a pale little thing with long black hair. Then we moved to Arizona and I tanned up a bit. Now, I have a little Snow White of my own - my little boy has the same dark hair and rosy cheeks as I had as a baby. So beautiful - the fairest little boy in all the land, in my opinion, but I'm biased. Not many people know where Snow White originates but it comes from the Ulster Cycle, an Irish epic. It is the story of Deirdre of the Sorrows. It's only a small part of the epic but it's one of the most tragic...Just a warning, there's a lot Gaelic names in this story, so try to keep up.
Deirdre and Naoise
When Deirdre was born, it was prophesied that she would be a great beauty. As such, King Conchobar hid her away so he could keep her for himself when she was old enough to marry. He secluded her in an isolated cabin in the woodlands outside his castle, to be raised by a wise woman, Leabharcham. The young girl told her caretaker that she would fall in love with a man with the same coloring as a raven in the snow - hair as black as a raven's feathers, skin as white as snow, and cheeks the color of blood. The wise woman, knowing a young man of such qualities, conspired to bring the two together. Leabharcham lured Naoise to the woods, where he met Deirdre, and the two young people fell in love. They lived in the woods together for some time, happy and free.
But King Conchobar eventually found out and was furious. After sending a spy to confirm that Deirdre was still beautiful, his army attacked their home. Naoise and his brothers fought valiantly but ultimately, they all died. Naoise was killed by a spear by the king's most loyal warrior, Eogan mac Durthacht. King Conchobar took Deirdre for his wife but she was cold towards him. As punishment for her coldness, he offered her up to Eogan for sex. Rather than be raped by the man who killed her True Love, she threw herself in front of a chariot and her head was dashed upon the rocks. Fin.
Can't save your life
Though nothing I bleed for
Is more tormenting
I'm losing my mind
And you just stand there
And stare as my world divides
I don't know why True Love has to end in heartbreak, it just does. Even in real life, it does - even if you have a happy life together - because someone has to die first. Anyway, I chose this song because I like Evanescence. This song gets pretty dark (which is how I like 'em) because she's describing being obsessed with her love, this Snow White Queen, who seems to be out of her reach. Obsessive love is a common theme for gothic metal. When you can't get someone out of your head and they're the only thing you can think about. And when you think of something that much, eventually it's going to leak into your subconscious and every single dream you have will include them. That's just how brains work. Seems unhealthy....Maybe Amy Lee should get a hobby to get her mind off this Snow White Queen. Something to distract her - like a new puppy. Overall, the songs on "The Open Door" seem to be about an obsessive kind of love. The content and depth of the lyrics, combined with the incorporation of gothic rock and the use of choral and symphonic elements gives the entire album this amazing, dramatic sound. Really makes you feel the dark and twisty feels. I've probably been spending too much time in that level of vibration. But Samhain approaches, so it's appropriate. It's the time for facing your shadow self and acknowledging that your demons exist. And it's better to do something constructive - write a song/poem/story, make art, dance wildly and with abandon - before the demon's obsession consumes you.
"The Hazards of Love" album by The Decemberists was a concept album/rock opera that follows a fairy tale dreamed up by the band's front man, Colin Meloy. Here's a brief retelling of the story. Once upon a time....
"The Hazards of Love" Album Artwork
A fair maiden, Margaret, rode out into the taiga. Along the way, she came upon an injured fawn. Being sweet and kind, she stops to help it but, as she kneels down to check its leg, the fawn transforms into a beautiful young man, William. Enthralled by each other, they make love and then William disappears into the forest, as shape-shifting men tend to do. A few months later, Margaret discovers she's knocked up. Desperate, she runs back to the forest to find William. Hearing her cries, William returns to Margaret and finally declares his love for her. They are cuddling and reminiscing about their first night together when William's mother, The Forest Queen, discovers them. And, boy, is she pissed off about their romance.
You see, The Forest Queen saved William when he was abandoned by the river as a baby. She loved him as if he was her own child and bestowed him with the gift of Immortality. She views William's actions as ingratitude. He begs her to allow him one night with Margaret and she concedes. But only one night as a mortal man and then he can never see her again. After the deal is struck, Margaret is kidnapped by The Rake. The Forest Queen, being a raging bitch, gives The Rake permission to rape Margaret and allows him to escape. William cannot follow across the river unless he gives up his life for safe passage. Meanwhile, Margaret is screaming for him to save her. Then, the Rake is stopped by a trio of ghosts - his children whom he murdered - allowing William enough time to rescue Margaret. As they are running away, they choose to get "married" by jumping in the river and drowning while William is still a mortal. As they drown, the make a final pledge of love as they die. Fin.
With this long last rush of air
We'll speak our vows in starry whisper
And when the waves came crashing down
He closed his eyes and softly kissed her
What the fuck is with these people choosing to drown in order to be together forever?! That seems to be a common theme in these fairy tales, even ones that have been written in recent years. In fact, fairy tales written in modern times seem to be even darker, like they're going to be turned into a movie directed by Darren Aronofsky. Let's just drown ourselves! It'll be fun....and it's the ONLY WAY! I didn't know this story was going to take such a dark turn when I started listening to the album - and I have been listening to it the whole time I've been writing this. Because I like the Decemberists. In fact, I sought out a Decemberists song specifically for this month, because they're usually so whimsical and lovely. I've heard "The Rake's Song" on my playlist several times, but I hadn't taken the time to listen to the album before. In this case, the whole is greater than the sum of its parts. It does get a little confusing because Colin Meloy sings both the parts of William and The Rake. Shara Nova, who plays The Forest Queen, is wonderful and haunting (I highly recommend listening to "The Queen's Rebuke"). The music composition has such depth and makes wonderful use of the harpsichord (I fucking love the harpsichord...it's my favorite instrument). Other favorite songs on the album include "Annan Water" and "The Wanting Comes in Waves." But, for today's video, I chose the final song - "The Hazards of Love 4 (The Drowned)" - because it's beautiful and sad and perfectly sums up the entire story. It's a duet - Meloy's strong, soulful tenor harmonizes so well with Becky Starks ghostly soprano....it really is a brilliantly done song and a lovely ending to the entire album. Seriously...try not to cry.
The last couple of posts were kind of heavy, so let's start off this week a little lighter. Because it's been raining all day but I'm still in a pretty good mood. The movie "Enchanted" is a parody of the classic Disney fairy tale and romantic comedies in general. For those who haven't seen it, the plot centers around a classic animated princess named Giselle (played by the eternally lovely Amy Adams) who is thrust from her fairy tale world into the "real world," which is always invariably synonymous with New York City. A man and his daughter - who believes wholeheartedly in the magic of fairy tale romance - take pity on her and invite her into their apartment, because they're convinced she's just a beautiful crazy person that needs help. As a beautiful crazy person myself, I intensely relate to this situation and hope someone takes pity on me if I get lost in some new city (which will most likely happen one day). Anyway, crazy antics ensue - people start bursting into song, she turns their curtains into amazing dresses, and other fairy tale characters come into the picture, including Prince Charming intent on rescuing Giselle. But, of course, the cynical father falls head over heels for her, despite being engaged to another woman (played by the always amazing Idina Menzel). In the end, the Evil Stepmother/Sorceress is subdued, Giselle marries the father, Idina goes back to the fairy tale world with Prince Charming and everyone gets their Happy Ending. Well, except for the Evil Stepmother, but she was never going to get one anyway. In summation, it's a light-hearted romance with some really cute, tongue-in-cheek songs.
Amy Adam's in "Enchanted"
During "That's How You Know," the cynical divorce lawyer/father - Robert - is upset after a big fight with his fiance, Nancy (Idina Menzel), after she finds Giselle in his apartment. Giselle uses this song to convince Robert to send her flowers and apologize to make up for it, even though he's not big on the whole cheesy romance thing. The scene is pretty funny, because Amy Adams starts singing and Patrick Dempsey is like, "What the fuck is happening?!" and tries to get her to stop. And that's when the Jamaican steel drum band starts up....magically! Then everyone is singing and dancing and having a grand old time. I have often wished this would happen to me, that I would start singing and - Suddenly! - I'm leading a whole army of people in a musical number. Just one of the things a beautiful crazy person imagines while she's walking down the street. Towards the end, Giselle makes a wreath of yellow flowers and gives them to a bunch of doves to deliver to Nancy, to which Robert understandably says "Are you crazy? They're birds!" But, at the end of the song, he gets a call from Nancy - she's happy and all is forgiven. There's your relationship tip of the day, fellas - have a flock of birds deliver a bouquet of roses to your beloved when you've fucked up. Or give her chocolate - that works, too.
Well, does he leave a little note to tell you
You are on his mind?
Send you yellow flowers when the sky is gray?
Hey!
He'll find a new way to show you
A little bit everyday
That's how you know
That's how you know he is your love
Some girls don't like this shit....but I do. Kind of wish The Husband would do more of it....or do it at all. He used to tell me watching movies like "Enchanted" (and "Sleepless in Seattle," which we watched on Amazon Prime this weekend) gave me unrealistic expectations. To an extent, he's definitely right. But I don't expect flowers every day...just on my birthday would be kind of nice. Oh well. I'm also the kind of girl who would give a guy a chance if he used a cheesy pickup line...if I thought it was really clever. My favorite is when a guy trips and falls while he's walking and then turns to whatever girl is there and says, "You're the only girl I've ever fallen for." ::swoon:: There are some other good ones out there on the internet - like "Am I dead? Because I'm pretty sure you're an angel!" or "If you were a library book, I'd check you out." It takes a lot of guts to sound this dorky and I appreciate that. But, understandably, it's hard to figure out which girls will think it's cute and which girls will give you a Death Stare. However, if a girl breaks out into random song, wondering if she'll like your cheesy pickup line is probably the least of your worries. Because, without a doubt, she has a Handsome Prince or an Evil Sorcerer following close behind and that's a level of shit most people would rather not deal with on a Monday.
The video is the aforementioned musical number. Because the expressions on Patrick Dempsey's face are half the fun. It also has the lyrics on the bottom, if you're inclined to sing along.
This is a version of the main theme from "Swan Lake" that Canadian metal band, The Agonist, composed for their second album, "Lullabies for the Dormant Mind." I love the ballet and I also happen to love the story of Swan Lake. The ballet was written by Pyotr Ilyich Tchaikovsky, the Russian composer who is famous for writing the three Great Ballets, all of which are based on fairy tales - Sleeping Beauty, The Nutcracker, and Swan Lake. Unlike the other two, Swan Lake does not exactly have a happy ending. Well, it has a Russian Happy Ending, which aren't particularly happy at all but are more beautiful and poetic.
Here is the story of Swan Lake. One day, Prince Siegfried is hunting in the forest, unhappy that he will have to choose a bride at a ball because he wants to marry for love. He gets lost in the forest and happens upon a lake filled with swans. He is about to shoot one with his bow when it transforms into a beautiful maiden, Odette. She explains that a sorcerer, Rothbart, has cursed her and her companions to live as swans during the day. The curse will only be broken if someone who has never loved before pledges to love only her forever. Siegfried offers to kill Rothbart but if the sorcerer dies before the curse is broken, Odette and her friends will stay swans forever. Over the course of the night, Odette and Siegfried fall in love. Siegfried vows to declare his love for Odette at the upcoming ball.
At the ball, Rothbart appears with his daughter, Odile (the Black Swan) magically disguised as Odette. The other princesses that are in attendance try to get Siegfried's attention but he only has eyes for the transformed Odile. Odette appears at the window, trying to get Siegfried's attention, but to no avail. Siegfried declares his love for Odile in front of all the guests. Afterwards, Rothbart reveals that Siegfried has declared his love for the wrong woman. Siegfried, horrified by the mistake he has made, returns to the lake. He apologizes to Odette. She forgives him but the damage is done. Heartbroken that the curse will never be lifted and she will never be with her True Love, Odette chooses to die than to remain a swan forever. Siegfried, not wanting to live without his Odette, chooses to die with her and they both jump into the lake and drown. Their act of love breaks the curse on Odette's friends and they return to their human form as Odette and Siegfried ascend to heaven. Fin.
Odette and her friends, St. Petersburg Ballet
That's how you know the difference between a romantic comedy and a romantic tragedy. They follow almost exactly the same pattern and at some point, the lovers are going to be separated, seemingly indefinitely. In a romantic comedy, the Universe conspires through a series of unlikely events to bring them together finally and the story ends with a wedding. In a romantic tragedy, the only way the lovers can be together is in death. Usually one or both dies, and a suicide pact like the one seen in Swan Lake is not uncommon in these stories.
"The Swan Princess" came out when I was a kid and I loved the movie. They gave the movie a happier ending than the one I described. Yes, the Prince declares his love mistakenly to the Black Swan but True Love's Kiss is able to save Odette. I think the original ending is more beautiful. Sometimes, Death is the only ending for a tragic love story and is needed to fix the world in which the story resides, as in "Romeo and Juliet" or "Tristan and Isolde." I find that Russian fairy tales seem to understand this best - not everyone can have a happy ending. That's an important lesson for children to learn.
I really like this version, because it's a capella or without accompaniment (instrumentation), for those not familiar with the term. The Agonist has a female singer and she sings all the parts in the song that would normally be played by an orchestra. I think the singer who did this particular version was Alissa White-Gluz and she has a very clean, clear soprano voice. I've always been jealous of sopranos. Yes, altos and mezzos sound very soulful, but sopranos always sound ethereal and ghostly. And they can hit those ridiculously high notes. Fucking bitches.
Another gem from my savior, Florence Welch. "Blinding" is kind of a break up song. She was in love, maybe she still is, but reality set in. It's the worst feeling when you realize that being in love with someone doesn't fix everything in your life. You still have responsibilities, all those problems you were ignoring are still there when you wake up from a cloud of infatuation. I think Florence's inspiration for "Blinding" was that stupid saying that "Love is blind." It's not - infatuation is blind. Real love is when you finally escape the addicted feeling and you're awake enough to see that the other person is not perfect - just a normal human - but you still want to be around them anyway. "Stranger in a Strange Land" summed up love best - "Love is that condition in which the happiness of another person is essential to your own."
"Blinding" borrows the imagery of the sleeping princess, like from Sleeping Beauty or Snow White (who makes an appearance in the song). Let's lay it all out there on the table - True Love's Kiss symbolized sexual awakening in classic fairy tales. The princess couldn't be saved until some prince/knight/knave/what-have-you awakened those desires. This is based on the assumption that sex starts with a kiss (which it usually does, unless you're Julia Roberts in "Pretty Woman"). Obviously, Florence isn't using that particular symbolism here. Instead, the dream-like state she was in was that infatuation phase I was telling you about - the "Honeymoon" period, which is a real thing that happens. You have the "butterflies in your stomach feeling" and everything is all shiny and new. Like a trip into Wonderland. And it can last for a long time, if there aren't any complications. That's why experts say you shouldn't get married to someone until after you've been together for a year, by which time the Honeymoon period usually wears off. Now, not all relationships last that long, obviously - hence those complications. Especially when you're older, real life creeps in a lot faster. People realize their limitations a lot sooner. And Love, even if it exists, does not conquer all.
And I could hear the thunder and see the lightning crack
And all around the world was waking, I never could go back
'Cause all the walls of dreaming, they were torn right open
And finally it seemed that the spell was broken
The quickness of it can feel disorienting, which is what the lyrics are trying to capture. The initial infatuation can make you feel weightless and young, and when it's over, everything seems to crumble and you just want to get it back. But you can't ever get it back. So what do you do when it ends? Do you let yourself become bitter? Depressed? Do you stop eating and sleeping? Do you let it destroy you? Florence Welch proposes something better than that - acknowledging that it's over. Once you do this, eventually, you move on - Snow White stitches up the circuit boards, i.e., your heart and mind heal and you're capable of loving again. And that's the happy ending. You will survive, just like Gloria Gaynor.
Thanks for listening to my cynical rambling. For your reward, you may listen to the song.
Many cultures have a "Why the Sun chases the Moon" mythos, so it's hard to trace where this story starts. Probably Ancient Sumaria....everything seems to start in Ancient Sumaria. But, to be fair, this story is also present in a lot of Native American and Mesoamerican cultures as well, so the story may be as old as humanity. Because that's what we did in the olden days - when it was dark and cold outside and we couldn't hunt, we told stories and made art.
The story of the Sun and Moon goes like this - The Moon loves the Sun so much that he chases her around the sky. That's it. Sometimes the Moon is the female and the Sun is male, but they follow each other, day in and day out. It's a magnetic attraction - one is pulling, one is pushing - but they can never be together. Because the Sun is like 8 light minutes away, which is probably like a zillion miles. I have no idea how far away the Sun is but I know the Moon is about 250,000 miles from Earth.
I did some research on the symbolism of the Sun and the Moon. The essential nature of the relationship between the Sun and Moon is that they are a balance of opposites, which also crosses cultures. However, at the core, there are similarities between them. To us, they appear the same size (because humans don't quite understand perspective), they share equal time in the sky throughout the year (because humans don't quite understand celestial orbits either), and they both provide light in some form. They're different but they're the same - which is Rule #1 of Romantic Comedies. Yin and yang in Chinese philosophy, dualism in Ancient Greece - you have to balance the elements that the Sun and Moon represent in order to reach inner peace/nirvana/Truth/True Love/whatever. Not to mention that the Sun and Moon is all over romantic literature, because it is the first romance. For example, Act II, Scene II of "Romeo and Juliet":
But, soft! what light through yonder window breaks?
It is the east, and Juliet is the sun.
Arise, fair sun, and kill the envious moon,
Who is already sick and pale with grief,
That thou her maid art far more fair than she
It's also common for the Sun to be used as a metaphor for love and be compared to someone you love (see "Lullaby" and "You are My Sunshine"). Hence today's song from Cursive. Essentially, he's saying that the person he's singing about completes him, but he's kind of resentful, because she's more amazing than he'll ever be, even though they are the same in some ways. Even though he knows all her darkness and the things that haunt her and the questionable choices she's made, she still shines. And he's stuck reflecting her glow, following her around. Near the end, he gets kind of childish and for a moment he's like, "Maybe I'm the one who's awesome," but then he's like..."No, you really are more amazing." The sad thing is...the Sun doesn't really need the Moon, but the Moon needs the Sun. The Sun can shine without him, but the Moon is just a hunk of cold rock without the Sun. There's your philosophy/astronomy lesson for today.
My flesh and blood? It can't be true
You're everything I could never be
I was no one, now I'm two
You're actually here acknowledging that I am the we that makes us complete
Taking the interpretation of our theme very loosely, this song shares its name with a Hans Christian Andersen tale and that's where the similarities end. The classic "Thumbelina" follows the adventures of a tiny girl, no bigger than her mother's thumb (hence the name), as she encounters woodland creatures and faeries in her search for true love. Meanwhile, the subject of Nightmare of You's "Thumbelina" is a petite girl (normal size, just shorter than average) who, bored of married life, walks along the highway until some person (male, female, or otherwise) picks her up to have sex. I mean, those are adventures but not exactly the kind that are suitable for children to hear.
Here's my take on the song. I think the song is sung from the perspective of a man who picked her up once and has fallen in love with her. In fact, he could be the "loon on the hillside" that got her pregnant. She thought he knew her better than anyone, but he fucking left her, like everyone else she hails down. Now, she's still stuck in a marriage with her husband - who is clueless and doesn't realize that she's sleeping around with strangers - and she has to take care of a lovechild. I have no idea what the significance of her having big thumbs is, though. I'm lost on that one.
My thumbelina
I've never seen a pair of digits quite like yours before
And I have traveled shore to shore
In such arduous pallor
Your almost perfect body's got me quivering in a ball
I found Nightmare of You when I was going through a weird emo phase, when I wanted chipper music but strange and twisted lyrics. Nightmare of You doesn't disappoint on that front. One of my favorite songs by them is "I Want to be Buried in Your Backyard," that perennial classic of obsessive love. Where "Thumbelina" is a fairly peppy indie standard, "I Want to be Buried in Your Backyard" has a darker bent, if you couldn't tell from the title. Though all the members are American, you can definitely get a hint of British influence. Nightmare of you combines the best of synth pop and semi-poetic lyrics, and it doesn't hurt that Brandon Reilly has a great voice. It's also pretty impressive how well-known the band is, considering they self-published their debut album. They kind of fell off the radar after the late 2000s but apparently, the Nightmare of You is still together and performing, although they haven't released anything new is several years. Oh well. Their old stuff is pretty good. Just a fan-made lyric video for today - being a pretty small-time indie band, they don't have any official music videos.
Okay, so perhaps the 90s nostalgia will still be around, even if I'm following a theme. This particular song is a re-telling of a fairytale that I remember reading in Honors English during my freshman year of high school. We had extensive discussions about the purpose and structure of fairytales in the class, which I remember being very interesting. In the song, the lead singer of Spin Doctors - Chris Barron - is trying to convince this girl that she should choose him over her other suitor (which we're led to think is a rich, preppy asshole). If you've seen the Spin Doctors, they basically look like the stereotypical 90s hippies/stoners - fluffy hair, scraggly beards, stupid hats....you know what I'm talking about. The choice is clear - choose love over money.
The fairytale it's based on goes a little like this....Once upon a time, there was a beautiful princess whose father had decided it was time for her to get married. They invited all the princes in the land and requested that they bring a gift for the princess. The princess was going to choose who she'd marry based on the gift she liked the most. The first prince brought a gold crown encrusted with diamonds, the second a box filled with sapphires and other precious gems, and so on and so forth. Then, one prince comes in and he's clearly from a poor kingdom because his clothes are pretty shabby. He announces that he has no gift but if she chooses him, she will never know a day without love.
So, who does the princess choose?
Marry him or marry me
I'm the one that loves you baby can't you see?
I ain't got no future or a family tree
But I know what a prince and lover ought to be
I know what a prince and lover ought to be
Well, the actual ending of this tale might surprise you. The princess turns to her father and says she chooses the prince with the box of sapphires and her reasoning is that she thinks that gift is the most valuable. Because she's not a stupid bitch. Marrying for love is kind of a recent thing and is really only a luxury that us Westerners have come to believe is a necessity. For much of the world and for a long time, marriage was a financial transaction and love had nothing to do with it. I mean, sure, it's super nice if you like your spouse but that's not the point. The point is that you're financially stable and have someone to take care of you when you get sick and old. The idea of a fairytale romance is pure nonsense, because princesses never got to marry for love. If you were a princess, it was guaranteed that you were going to be married to the heir of the kingdom whose alliance was most needed for your country's prosperity. And they did it with honor and grace, because it was their duty. Were they happy, though? Perhaps, at least for a few moments here and there. I've read a lot about the lives of royalty in France and it sounds like it was not uncommon for both the King and Queen to have extramarital affairs. It was tolerated - even expected - as long as they performed their marital duties when it was required. And usually, after a royal heir was produced, no one gave a shit what the Queen did in her free time, anyway, as long as she was discrete. Not very romantic, but that's life.
The video is in black and white, and for some reason, Rita Repulsa is involved. The plot essentially follows the same line as the lyrics. There's a pretty waitress who has to choose between two guys - one is a dude wearing gold chains and is pretty obviously rolling in cash. The other guy is the bassist for the Spin Doctors (apparently, his name is Mark)...before they got their "one-hit-wonder" money. Ultimately, she chooses Mark - but not until after she's been wined and dined by rich gangster guy.
No "Song du Jour" today, just some housekeeping. I'm going to be testing out monthly themes to better organize the songs I choose and ensure there's more variety from day to day. Otherwise, this blog will turn into mainly 90s nostalgia, angsty rock songs, and more Taylor Swift than the average human can handle. I also plan to build an "About the Writers" page and do some work to make the website more functional and mobile friendly.
For September, I've decided to start off with fairy tale songs - songs about fairy tales, influenced by fairy tales, written for fairy tales, or with lyrics that even vaguely mention fairy tales. I love fairy tales and some of my favorite memories are curling up with my dad to listen to him read a story from The Brothers Grimm. The imagery that is stirred up when you hear these stories makes for great music, with dramatic lyrics and epic melodies. They are a favorite influence for goth bands and pop divas alike, and I think it will set the stage nicely for October's them - which is, of course, all about the spooky.
As always, let me know if you like the changes or if you have ideas that I can write about in future posts. Thanks for reading, fellow music sluts, and have a happy Saturday!
