I heard this song (the original version) the other day while I was giving my son a bath. I had forgotten how much I liked it - it is, in fact, one of my favorite Alanis Morissette songs. Critical reviews all describe the melody as "haunting," one of the key factors as to why I like it so much. "Uninvited" came out after the success of "Jagged Little Pill," her first album that was released worldwide. It was released as a single from the soundtrack for "City of Angels." Regardless of how you feel about the movie and its premise (which we'll get to in a minute), the soundtrack was brilliant and contained some of the most iconic music of the decade. For example, "Iris" - which Taylor Swift introduced very accurately during one of her concerts as "one of the greatest songs of all time" - was also released as a single for the movie. "Uninvited" earned Morissette two Grammy's in 1999 - for Best Rock Song and Best Female Rock Vocal - and it was nominated for a Golden Globe as Best Original Song.
Like anyone would be
I am flattered by your fascination with me
There has been much speculation about this song. Because the tune does have a darkness to it, some have interpreted as being directed towards someone who is stalking the singer. However, this is not the case. In Morissette's own words, she has called this her "fear of love" song. To be pursued by someone you could feel a strong attraction towards but putting up a shield because of the murkiness of your own mind. In interviews, Morissette indicates that she had been going through some things during the writing of this song. She saw a raw snippet of "City of Angels" when she was asked to write something for the soundtrack, and she was inspired by the turbulence and confusion exhibited by Meg Ryan's character. Not being a stranger to romantic turmoil, she describes the hesitance to jump into something uncertain as a natural reaction to being burned. But the knowledge of pain is what makes it all the more blissful. "You don't really know how amazing things are unless you have the contrast of things not having been amazing for a certain amount of time, and I happen to like that theory."
Must be strangely exciting
To watch the stoic squirm
For those not as well versed in Meg Ryan movies as I am, I will recount "City of Angels" for you, because it is a truly romantic and tragic story. Nick Cage plays Seth, an angel who is charged to watch over humans in various ways but mostly to guide the dying to the next life. While watching over one of his humans, he becomes enamored with the efforts of the surgeon, Maggie (Meg Ryan), trying to save the man and her absolute torment when she fails. Seth quickly becomes obsessed with Maggie and makes a choice to become visible to her. They strike up a friendship which eventually turns into mutual attraction, which becomes a source of confusion for Maggie as she is already in a relationship with one of her colleagues. During the course of his duties, he meets a patient who used to be an angel but became human through a process called "falling." Seth begins contemplating the possibility to be with Maggie. In a symbolic act, he falls from a skyscraper and when he awakens after the fall, he is fully human, with all the pain and emotions that go along with it. He seeks out Maggie and when she discovers he has become human for her, they make love. I don't want to spoil the movie but let's just say their ecstasy is short-lived and it ends badly. Although Meg Ryan is still acting today, this movie came out right at the height of her career - once the 90s ended, Ryan was cast less frequently in the romantic comedies that made her famous. Part of it was that she wanted to branch out and do more serious films (like "City of Angels") but, unfortunately, that's just the reality of an actress who ages out of playing the ingenue.
You speak of my love like
You have experienced love like mine before
I chose to feature Red Sun Rising's cover of "Uninvited" simply because I like the singer's voice. This version is true to the original and preserves that chilling quality that was so acclaimed. I found the music video for this version disturbing and I can't exactly put my finger on why. In the video, an older man is looking out his window and he sees a neighbor across the way - a young woman - walking around her apartment naked in the middle of the night. The next day, he buys her a flower arrangement and leaves it at her door. That night, he watches her walking around again - this time, the flowers are on her table. As she stops to smell and enjoy them, a smile crosses the man's face. That's literally all that happens during the video but there is a sinister implication that it escalates after the video ends. The thing is, I know what that girl is thinking as she smells the flowers - we all have this fantasy of the "secret admirer" who turns out to be this perfect man who is everything we want him to be. However, when someone keeps showing up on your running path or seems to be invited to all the same parties you are, the feeling is more akin to being little more than prey. That's why "You" is so dangerous - because Joe Goldberg is that attractive man who wants to meet all your needs....and he also happens to be a murderous psychopath. That being said, the general consensus of women who watched "You" was that they'd happily be stalked by Joe. I even found myself thinking that, despite being very aware of the dangers of getting in a relationship with someone who is sociopathic and narcissistic. But, as the lyrics say, it is flattering to be wanted that much. To be on the receiving end of that much attention. Especially for those of us who love the spotlight. From what I understand of the second season, Joe meets someone who is just as creepily obsessive as he is and they live happily ever after....or do they? ::dramatic music::
I don't think you unworthy
I need a moment to deliberate
I've included both the Red Sun Rising cover and the original, for your listening pleasure. Enjoy!
I've had this song stuck in my head for a couple days. When I hear it, I know she's singing about Evan Peters (the lyrics "You've got hips like jagger and two left feet" especially remind me of him). Before they started dating, they were both in pretty abusive relationships. Peters' relationship was very visible because he was dating Emma Roberts (Julia Roberts' niece). She's not a nice person. She was verbally abusive to him, treated him like he was worthless, and - yes - she was physically violent. In the instances where the police would intervene, she'd always claim he was also violent but when they checked them both out, she'd be free of marks whereas he'd be beat to shit. People seem to think men can't be victims of domestic violence, but it happens more often than we realize. I think these public situations - like between Peters and Roberts and, more recently, Johnny Depp's issues with Amber Heard - are bringing more light to the problem. Anyway, halsey's experiences in her relationships have left her a little mistrustful of anyone who tries to get close to her. She's cognizant of this and how her defense mechanisms could ruin a good thing. So she's trying to work through it.
Oh, we're dancing in my living room
And up come my fists
And I say, "I'm only playing"
But the truth is this
That I've never seen a mouth
That I would kill to kiss
And I'm terrified, but I can't resist
And I say
I recently had the opportunity to take a short relational psychology course online. It was mostly from a women's studies perspective and it had a lot to do with why we (women) act the way we do and the latent instincts that these behaviors evolved from. There were several insights I found interesting, mostly because I realized - at least, for me - that they were true. First, we don't share important details with people we don't trust. I know this is true because I can find myself mentally calculating how to avoid telling people certain things, even in the middle of conversations where those facts might be relevant. Second, the facilitator was discussing something she realized after talking to one of her students - if a woman doesn't feel safe, she can't feel loved. This got me thinking because one of the indicators of attraction (that develops into love), from a man's standpoint, is to become protective over the object of his affection. If she reciprocates the feeling, she appreciates it - if not, the behavior can be cloying and seen as a little possessive (in an unattractive way).
I was thinking about it and there are certain behaviors where, if a man I love does them, I feel special and safe. Putting a hand on my back to gently redirect me towards a safer path; standing perhaps a little to close to me when we're in a moderately crowded room; rushing to help me when I feel flustered; checking that I made it home safe after a night out; and, especially, driving cautiously when I'm with them, because pretty much everyone in my family is a terrible and/or aggressive driver so if I have a choice, I generally prefer to drive myself places (unfortunately, I usually lose the fight over who gets to drive). However, I found myself unable to sleep on Friday night because I was thinking about how I'm genuinely unable to acknowledge when I'm feeling unsafe. I've been doing a lot of Inner Child work lately and I was able to figure it out pretty quickly - throughout my life, when I felt unsafe, those feelings were often ignored or disregarded. As a result, I learned to repress feelings of fear. I learned that repressing a lot of things - my needs, my emotions, my thoughts, my opinions, even my personality - was in my best interest (the best way to stay "safe") and it's been a long road of undoing that programming.
Beautiful stranger
Here you are in my arms and I know
That beautiful strangers
Only come along to do me wrong
And I hope, beautiful stranger
Here you are in my arms
But I think it's finally
Finally, finally, finally, finally safe
For me to fall
So, how does a lifetime of repressing fear and a need for safety manifest? Pretending I don't need help or that I can take care of myself. Pretending I'm not scared when I am (putting on a "brave face"). Becoming overly defensive in response to violated boundaries or becoming emotionless during moments of conflict. Being unable to ask for what I want or need, because I feel like I'm imposing on other people. Keeping my thoughts and emotions to myself, because being vulnerable with someone is too much of a risk. Being unable to admit that I want certain people to feel protective over me, because I never really had that growing up - and feeling disappointed when they don't meet that need. Being protective over people who don't feel like they have to reciprocate because I'm so "self-sufficient." I'm often that friend who asks people to text me when they get home, but I rarely get that back. When I think of my inner child, I see a little girl hiding in a closet, blasting Hanson on her Walkman so she can drown out the yelling. Music has always been my comfort zone. Especially recently, with everything going on in my life, I've been listening to my favorite songs on repeat.
I've never recognized a purer face
You stopped me in my tracks
And put me right in my place
Used to think that loving
Meant a painful chase
But you're right here now
And I think you'll stay
Like everyone, I had all these great plans for 2020 (and beyond) and then the Universe threw me, not just one, but several curve balls. "Do you really want to go through this? Okay, great! Here's a huge complication, good luck with that." Venus Retrograde in Gemini - especially if it's in one of your angular houses (i.e., 1, 4, 7, and 10) - has a tendency to have you rethinking your whole life and everything in it. It's about reassessing patterns, especially in relationships. Codependent patterns will become especially unbearable - people-pleasing, seeking approval from others, denying your own needs, self-criticism/self-judgment, and compulsively trying to fix or take care of others (who refuse to take care of themselves). These behaviors result in low self-esteem and internalized self-hatred, and make you easily manipulated and controlled by others. However, Venus is all about self-esteem and self-love, which is why these patterns become so obvious during this time. We start to realize that we deserve better than how we've allowed others to treat us. We start taking care of ourselves more and stop focusing on how others perceive us. We begin to understand where our efforts are unappreciated and accept that maybe it's time to let go.
I've resumed my daily writing habit and I've been using the time to work on some other stuff - mostly journaling and short stories, but also world-building for a novel I want to write and some (bad) poetry. Don't be surprised if the songs take a more nostalgic turn or if the posts become a bit shorter.
I thought this song was appropriate for the Scorpio Full Moon (even though I found it on my Cancer playlist). Overdramatic, dark but too emo to be goth (that was a dig), and it's about super intense unrequited love, which the astro-community tends to associate with Scorpio energy. Also, it's my moon return! So I'm actually having a pretty good time right now. With my latest additions from the Witches Box, I now have four books that are sex magick/tantra related. Five, if you count "The Red Goddess," (which I kinda do - I'm going to say four and a half). To the outside, that may look like specialization. But no, that's just where my head is at lately. Luckily, I can blame the hormones now, but that excuse won't hold after the baby comes. After that, I'll just blame it on having my moon in Scorpio. And it's research for my book - always a handy excuse.
I breathe you in with smoke in the backyard lights
(Backyard light)
We used to laugh until we choked into the wasted nights
(Wasted nights)
It was the best time of my life, but now I sleep alone
(Sleep alone)
So darling, don't, don't wake me up, 'cause my thrill is gone
(Say I'm wrong)
In the sunset turning red behind the smoke
Forever and alone
Yeah!
As I said, we had a Full Moon in Scorpio this morning and we're still going to be in this phase tonight, which is when most witches will be doing their rituals (if they celebrate esbats). For this full moon, there are various forms of Scorpio-related witchcraft to choose from. Honoring the dead and ancestor worship, sex magick, shadow work, personal transformation spells, and releasing rituals are all potentially powerful ways to harness the full moon's energy tonight. I'm going to focus on releasing, because ironically, that's something Scorpio energy struggles with most.
When we consider the Taurus-Scorpio axis, which tonight's full moon engages, a key element to understand is how each sign interprets and gains strength. Taurus is concerned with independence and establishing strong roots that are ultimately based within the self. Being an earth sign, Taurus is like a large tree with deep roots, that is wholly distinct from the rest of the forest. Scorpio energy, on the other hand, gains strength from entanglement, by merging with others and absorbing traits to create a greater whole. As a water sign, Scorpio can be like the mouth of a river that meets the ocean - you can't tell where either begins or ends but the mixture creates a more fertile area. I'm going to step away from the analogies a bit, but the end result is there is a muddiness of identity that is particularly unique to Scorpio. This sign has a gift for transformation but the end result is that the elements used for this transformation become fused and are extremely hard to extract from the end result. Even if these elements are toxic, even when they block true transformation. Hence the struggle with letting go.
Out of all the signs, Scorpio has a tendency to be associated with some negative descriptors - obsessive, possessive, vindictive, manipulative, secretive, cold, and even cruel. However, being a Fixed sign, Scorpio is considered committed and loyal (they're considered the most loyal sign), partially because of this desire to merge. All of that other stuff is about self-preservation and protection. Once entangled with an element (habits, relationships, thought patterns, memories), they take on ownership of it, so that removing it forcibly becomes an act of violence and an experience of pain. As such, instances of betrayal and rejection are especially painful for this sign ("my love for you was bulletproof"). In order for Scorpio placements to truly trust another, they have to become vulnerable and let down these defenses - which is fucking terrifying for them. Ironically, they have a desire for others to be vulnerable with them, because that's how entanglement is achieved. If you are a Scorpio placement (especially in the Big Three), people just tend to tell you random information about themselves while you're trying to say as little as possible. Happens to me all the time, without any prompting at all. Meanwhile, I have issues opening up to people, even my family. But back to the whole fear of vulnerability thing - the fear stems from the logic that if someone truly saw you and understood you, they could destroy you. If they wanted. Scorpio thinks strategically and avoiding destruction is the name of the game - giving someone this level of power is something they don't do easily or willingly. After a betrayal of this magnitude, vengeance against the betrayer becomes a requirement of existential paramount.
This isn't fair!
(No!)
Don't you try to blame this on me
(Ohhh)
My love for you was bulletproof but you're the one who shot me
And God damn it, I can barely say your name
So I'll try to write and fill the pen with blood from the sink
Woah oh, oh oh
But don't just say it, you should sing my name
Pretend that it's a song 'cause forever it's yours
And we can sing this on the way home
I know that sounds bad, but I promise there are a lot of good things about Scorpio energy. However, this full moon is about releasing the bad stuff - such as the desire for vengeance and holding onto the pain of betrayal and rejection - because letting go of these things are ultimately for our highest good. The collective is currently experiencing a lot of turmoil for obvious reasons - anger, fear, grief, anxiety, depression, numbness. All of which serve an important purpose initially. However, holding onto these emotions without an outlet or way to transform them is unhealthy and can be destructive. That's why the transformative power of Scorpio is so critical at this juncture. Though you may disagree with where we are in this pandemic, we are being pushed into a transitional stage. Transitional stages are difficult, because there's a pull to return to normal but also a renewed awareness that you can't. You can deny this reality (by either refusing to leave isolation or stubbornly trying to return to normal); you can be depressed that your options are still limited; you can bargain about what guidelines you'll follow and which you won't; you can be angry at being forced to follow inconvenient rules for the "greater good;" or you can accept what is happening and try to forge a new path within the current constraints. You may recognize these options as the stages of grief and we're all somewhere within this spectrum, or maybe vacillating between different stages as circumstances change. I've noticed - both in my own recent thoughts and the shared experiences of the people I follow on Twitter - that there has been an increase in nostalgia and memories popping up from the past. This is part of the process and I think it's something the brain does naturally to ease the pain of letting go. I'm finding that these memories - even the unpleasant/unhappy ones - have less of a sting, less of an impact on me. While this may be primarily reflective of my own growth, I'd like to think that this has been true for others as well. I feel as if there has been a shift in the tide. It's very slight, almost imperceptible, but I believe once we're on the other side of this, there will be some much needed clarity and truth. And, just in time, the moon is moving into Sagittarius tomorrow.
Also, the nodes are out of the Cancer-Capricorn axis and now on the Gemini-Sagittarius axis, which brings an entirely new and different round of bullshit for the collective. But I'll save that for another day, because I've noticed I've been hyper-ranty lately.
Final argument of the day - I think this song fits more my Scorpio Moon than my Cancer Sun because - in times of rejection and betrayal - Scorpio may prefer destruction (to the point of destroying themselves) but Cancer knows the best vengeance of all is cutting off someone's access to you. They don't do it willingly, but it's worth the pain in the end. Indeed, if a Cancer walks away, you've fucked up pretty badly.
Happy Hanson Day! Thought I'd forget, didn't you? Absolutely never! As such, I'm sharing one of my favorites. Yes, it is sung by Zac. There's something about his gravelly tenor that strikes me and seems especially fitting for sad, wistful lyrics, like the words in "Lulabelle."
The story behind this song that I've constructed is that the lyrics are about this girl whose whole existence is predicated on being beautiful, due to being in the public eye (like a beauty queen or a moviestar). People are so obsessed with her beauty that they don't see her for who she it. She becomes very depressed and she ends up killing herself (through an eating disorder but this part of the story is open to interpretation). Or it could be about a show dog. I don't think Hanson intended for this song to be given such a dark backstory but that's the story that comes to mind when I hear this song.
Recently, I watched a clip from Taylor Swift's new Netflix documentary. She was talking about her struggles with an eating disorder and it struck me how similar her experiences were to mine. Not just in how things got out of control but how she was able to get a handle on it and how she deals with those urges now. It always begins as this continual process of not feeling good enough, not being beautiful enough, and ruminating on how you look compared to an impossible ideal. It's the type of disease where you are an active participant in reinforcing the pattern, even though it never began with you. She talked about looking at pictures of herself and how she'd fret about every curve. And how every day she was picked apart by someone for not looking beautiful and slim. Her inner critic amplified the voice of tabloids whereas mine just replayed whatever awful things my mom said in her rages, but still - the experience is the same. It happens gradually - you exercise for a little longer every day, you eat a little less. You pretend you're not tired or hungry. Unfortunately, a lot of these things are easy to hide or lie about. "I ate before I came." "I just went for a 'quick' run." You just keep going, wallowing in self-hatred (which is so easy to perpetuate). Then everyone starts praising how amazing you look, unknowingly reinforcing a vicious cycle. And just like that, you're destroying yourself to be beautiful.
Lulabelle's leaving the ball
No more reason to stay
Or people to see
But everyone here knows your name
From the light on your face
In the frame that hangs
In the hall where lovely girls go
Lulabelle goes, Lulabelle no
The path back is always the same, though, and it comes from a place of self-love. It's about understanding what being beautiful means to you (and only you) and relying less on the validation of others. Taylor talked about her self-talk and that's critical. When she finds herself worrying about her weight or analyzing another tabloid picture, she says to herself "Stop. We don't do that any more. It made use extremely unhappy so we just don't do that any more." You can see the transformation in her videos. In the old music videos, she was impossibly thin - a literal stick figure. But in her latest videos - and I noticed this most in the "Delicate" video - she looks healthier. And happier. That takes strength - real strength. To make the choice every day to love and respect yourself, in spite of what the outside world - and especially that hypercritical inner voice - is telling you.
Truth be told, I almost did forget it was Hanson Day. But for some reason, my brain started playing this song, which was an immense comfort during some of my more troubling days. I've been having a lot of memories surface in the past week. There's a reason - and I'll discuss this more tomorrow - but the theme of this Flower Moon in Scorpio is releasing the past. Letting go of things that brought us pain, which is necessary in order to greet the future with open arms.
Chose a live version to share, because Hanson is one of those rare bands that always sounds as good as the album version or better when performing live.
Another old favorite found while looking through my music collection. "The Curse of Curves" was actually a free single I downloaded from somewhere - possibly from Amazon, possibly from Spinner.com when they were still doing the free downloads. It is also one of those songs that sounds more upbeat than the lyrics suggest it should be. Essentially, the song is about a guy who got into a relationship with a girl because she was pretty but is constantly cheating on her because she doesn't meet his intellectual/mental/emotional needs. He feels stuck in the relationship but he doesn't know how to leave because - on the outside - she's theoretically what he should want. Naturally (and because this is where my head has been at lately), I felt this was the perfect song to embody the upcoming Venus Retrograde in Gemini season. I've been formulating a good, informative rant about this for the past week, so please forgive me for getting a little astro-geeky in this post. I am seriously considering/working on another site for all my occult/esoteric/spiritual content, but until I have that fully hatched, it may bleed over into this blog occasionally. And by occasionally, I mean when the mood strikes me.
I've got the gift of one liners
And you've got the curse of curves
And with this gift I compose words
And the question that comes forward
Are you perspiring from the irony
Or sweating to these lyrics
And this just in
You're a dead fit
But my wit won't allow it
Before we start, some key dates to remember. Venus will be in Gemini for approximately four months, which is a long time for this planet. Venus entered Gemini on April 3 and his been in direct motion since then. However, we'll enter the "shadow" period tomorrow, May 5. There's some disagreement between astrologers on whether this shadow period has any real effect; however, for those who do account for a shadow period, things drastically slow down in the areas Venus touches and major themes start to emerge. Venus will officially station retrograde on May 13 and will remain retrograde until June 15, when it stations direct again. For those of you who have your natal chart handy, this retrograde will effect the planets and houses that land in - or make aspects to - 5° to 21°50" in Gemini (more on that below).
Let's set the stage a little bit with some basics. In astrology, Venus is the planet of love and pleasure. The areas of life that may be affected during the retrograde are relationships, art, beauty, and finances (especially luxury goods and services). Gemini is the sign of communication and intellect and is ruled by Mercury. Gemini is known for friendliness, curiosity, playfulness, and youth and - being a Mercurial sign - has a reputation for being a bit trickster-like. As a mutable sign, Gemini has a tendency to be adaptable and accepting the changeability of circumstances. Whereas its opposite sign, Sagittarius, is known as having a teacher/mentor-like demeanor, Gemini influence displays often as the perpetual student. Those with Gemini placements tend to be embroiled in many hobbies and interests and have a reputation for constantly learning.
So what does that mean for Venus in Gemini? While this will vary based on what House Venus will be transiting in your natal chart (which I'll go into more depth on below), the undertones of Venus in Gemini is generally a desire for more intellectual stimulation and light-hearted playfulness in your life. There's a focus on determining if your life - and the relationships, interests, and events you're currently engaged in - are mentally stimulating. In Love, Venus in Gemini is looking for a best friend and deep intellectual connection, and she can be fickle if she doesn't find these things. Especially with Venus stationing retrograde, this becomes a time to really consider the situation and understand what you need to be happy. It will also come with a push to make some hard changes that you didn't think were possible before. Does life ignite your passions or are you holding on to old ways of doing things because it's safer? If it's the latter, these habits will not serve you well while Venus is in Gemini.
I want someone provocative and talkative
But it's so hard when you're shallow as a shower
And from what I've heard with skin you'll win
Venus was last retrograde in Gemini during Spring/Summer 2012, so it may be helpful to review what was happening during that time to understand what to expect this time around. For example, my ascendant is in Gemini, which means Venus was jumping around the last degrees of my 12th House and the first half of my 1st House. The 1st House is who we appear to be to others and is often considered our "Mask." It rules our appearance but also our behavior when we first interact with others, including surface aspects of our personality. When I look back to Spring/Summer 2012, I was actually in a very similar situation where I was kind of socially isolated. I had been living with my parents after graduation and had my first job out of college. It was not the kind of job I expected to have after spending four years going to school and I had to swallow my pride a bit to take it. My relationship with The Husband was long-distance at this point and I didn't have much of a social life outside of going to work, which was drastically different than what I had experienced during college. However, as depressing as that sounds, I'm really grateful for that time because a lot of it was spent really trying to understand and develop who I was as a person. I spent a lot of my free time reading books and working on my writing. I volunteered a lot and helped my mom while she recovered from the fallout of her first major manic episode. And I began actually developing a personal witchcraft practice, which I had been nervous to do before for various reasons. Additionally, I developed a healthy, stable eating and exercise routine, which had been difficult to do at school, even when I was seeing a counselor. Towards the end of this transit, my maternal grandmother died and my family, recognizing me as a talented writer, asked me to write her obituary, giving me a chance to use my skills to alleviate some of the burden on my mom and uncles. In summation, retrogrades can be an excellent time to get your shit together and really figure out what you want out of life, if you're prepared to take advantage of it. It doesn't have to be all doom and gloom; it doesn't have to mean breakups and breakdowns. That being said, I'm going to share some of the knowledge I've gained during my adventures in amateur astrology and hope they can be of use to someone.
For today, I'm only going to over what a transit in each astrological House may bring. There are other things to consider, like planetary aspects within your natal chart, which will make this already extremely long post even longer. Additionally, I prefer to use the Placidus system for natal charts but I concede Whole House has its benefits, because its easier to read and you don't have to deal with intercepted Houses. However, if you have a late degree ascendant, Whole Houses can shift your whole chart back nearly an entire House, so be aware of that. Regardless of what system you're using, to understand where Venus in Gemini will have its greatest effect, look for which House(s) are in 5° to 22° Gemini on your chart. I've also included some potential journal questions for you to use, if you're into that kind of stuff. Enjoy!
House of Self (1st House): As I mentioned, this House is said to rule over your physical appearance, mannerisms, style, and taste. Venus transiting this House may have you wanting to overhaul your entire style and personality, if you're not in alignment with who you truly feel you are. This may manifest in changes of style and self-care. The influence of Venus may increase the desire to indulge in luxury products, especially items that change your outward appearance. There may be an increased desire to pursue intellectual interests and try new things. Ask Yourself: Is who I portray myself to be truly my authentic self? How can I more fully embody my authentic self?
House of Money and Possessions (2nd House): This House is traditionally associated with Taurus, a Venus-ruled sign. There may be an increased desire to purchase beautiful, quality items, especially artwork. During this transit, there may be a desire to change how you spend your money - particularly if you have a tendency to purchase items based on their cost and not their value. Venus in Gemini has a reputation for being free-handed with money, so it would be prudent to take a moment to think before making large purchases. Ask yourself: Do my possessions and financial habits reflect the direction I want to go in life?
House of Communication (3rd House): Venus in Gemini is known to be charming, social, and flirtatious. During this time, you may feel more talkative, especially about topics you're interested in. During the retrograde, focus may be on how you can improve your communication or how a recent miscommunication may have caused issues. It's all about learning now and you may be driven to explore new things, especially films, art, literature, and music. In fact, you may be interested in so many things that you may become overwhelmed. It's important to prioritize - just because you can binge that new Netflix show in one day doesn't mean you should. Ask yourself: How does the media I consume affect how I perceive the world? Are the things I watch and read truly bringing mepleasure or am I just trying to stay on top of what's popular?
House of Home (4th House): As you may have guessed, this House rules over your home and all the objects in it. Venus' influence desires a home that is beautifully decorated and accurately reflects the level of your financial success. With social Gemini in the picture, it should also be a place where you can easily entertain friends and family. While it may be difficult during this time of social isolation, if Venus is transiting this House, you may keenly feel the need to attend or host social events in your home. If you don't feel that your home is comfortable and beautiful, it can quickly feel like a prison during the retrograde if you're wanting to be a social butterfly. Ask yourself: Does my home reflect my preferred style? If not, what changes can I make so it's more pleasurable to be at home?
House of Creativity and Sex (5th House): Venus in Gemini is curious and playful. As such, you may be inspired to try new things, both in and out of the bedroom. Coincidentally, I recently saw a Playboy article about a spike in role-playing outfits for couples experiencing quarantine boredom. If you've been struck by a sexual slump, maybe it's time to break out a new bag of tricks. Additionally, if you've been feeling less creative during the societal downturn, you may get a new burst of inspiration to create something. Follow those instincts. Ask yourself: Do I feel inspired to create? If not, what can I do to feel more inspired?
House of Service and Health (6th House): This House rules over your work habits, volunteer work, and health. If you've been experiencing boredom at your job or with your health routine, you may want to switch things up. Venus in Gemini loves variety so this may manifest in a desire to try a new diet, exercise program, or maybe take on a side hustle that you're passionate about. If you're teleworking, you may be feeling the stress of working from home, without interruptions from coworkers breaking up your day. Gemini placements tend to take on a lot of nervous energy, so stress management is key at this time, especially if you're feeling overwhelmed. It may help to join a remote exercise class or working out with a friend (with reasonable social distancing), as you may be feeling the lack of social interaction that you normally would've gotten at your job. Ask yourself: What changes can I make right now to improve my health? How can I be of more service to others during these precarious times?
House of Partnerships and Marriage (7th House): If Gemini falls in this House, your desire for a partner (in both business and long-term romance) who is intellectually stimulating and playful may come to the forefront - to quote today's featured song, you "want someone provocative and talkative." It also becomes imperative that your partnerships inspire you to be curious and pursue unique interests. Venus in Gemini believes that the foundation of a good relationship starts with friendship and does not engage another romantically unless she finds them intriguing and intelligent. A deep connection is needed before commitment is even considered. Issues with communication may be highlighted. Ask yourself: Do I know what my intellectual needs are within a partnership? If so, are they being met through my current partnerships?
House of Death and Regeneration (8th House): Despite the name, this House actually rules over things like investments, inheritance, and joint finances. It also rules over the occult and the deeper, darker aspects of sex. During this time, it might be tempting to make risky investments and, as Venus in Gemini can be a little free-handed with money, to spend it unwisely. As long as you're doing your research beforehand and your decisions are data-driven, this could be beneficial. It's also a time to consider family inheritances - not just financial, but emotional ones, too. Intense emotions, like jealousy and possessiveness, can rear their ugly heads when Venus transits the 8th House. The retrograde may be a good time to explore what triggers these reactions. Finally, you may be driven to indulge in a sexual fantasy - if this is the case, it's important to discuss it with a potential partner beforehand; otherwise, miscommunication could put out the fire. Ask yourself: What deep desires am I repressing? What am I afraid I will lose (financially or otherwise) if I pursue them?
House of Mental Exploration (9th House): This House rules over higher education, spirituality, and long-distance travel. As Venus in Gemini is prone to boredom, you may have an intense urge to travel or, at the very least, get a change of scenery. If you've been wanting to further your education, now may be the time to consider what course you want to pursue and make plans for going after those goals. Both higher education and travel assuage Gemini's incurable curiosity and, if you've been stuck inside, may provide a light at the end of the tunnel. To engage this love of exploration, maybe take up a language you find beautiful. It may also be a good time to deepen your own spiritual practice and understanding. Ask yourself: What do I want to learn about right now? If I had the ability to go anywhere once restrictions are lifted, where would I go?
House of Career (10th House): The 10th House traditionally rules over your career and reputation. For many people, that may be on pause right now so the Venus Retrograde provides an opportunity to consider the path you're on. During this time, it's important to consider whether you find pleasure in your current career path and if it engages you intellectually. Venus in Gemini is also a skilled networker. If you are excited about you're current career, you might be pushed to become more connected in the wider community around your field. Now might be a good time to attend virtual conferences or take a class that will help you further your ambitions. Ask yourself: Do I enjoy my current career? What does a career I'm passionate about and inspired by look like?
House of Friends and Hopes (11th House): This House rules over your approach to friendship and your involvement in social groups. For Venus in Gemini, a transit through this House would usually involve a lot of social engagement. With the current limitations, you may feel stifled - if you don't get creative. If you're active on social media, this may be a great time to dive deeper into a niche interest and make contacts with others in that area. Try scheduling in time to join a book club or maybe find a meetup on the Internet. During the retrograde, it may be a good time to consider what you find fulfilling in friendships and social engagement. Is it the conversation? Is it the variety? Is it the connection and shared interests? It's also a good time to really consider the goals and objectives (i.e., Hopes and Wishes) that you have for your life and how you can put plans into practice now. Ask yourself: How much social interaction do I need to be happy and what do I have to do to meet my social needs? What goals do I want to accomplish and what can I do to put them in motion now?
House of Secrets, Sorrows, and Self-Undoing (12th House): Although it sounds like a negative and gloomy place to be, this is the House that rules over spiritual pursuits and understanding limitations. With a 12th House ruled by Gemini, that may mean intellectual limitations - where are you holding yourself back intellectually? Are your pre-conceived ideas keeping you from pursuing mystical or spiritual fulfillment? This House also rules over hidden enemies, so you may discover that others are spreading rumors about you (Gemini has a reputation for being gossipy) or that someone isn't as much of a friend as you thought they were. Even in these unhappy situations, it's important to understand the lessons that come out of them. Ask yourself: What things - situations, relationships, responsibilities - do I feel is holding me back from achieving the life I desire?
I hope you enjoyed this explainer that I put together. Hopefully it didn't take you as long to read as it took me to write (but I loved every minute of it). Video for the song is below.
