"I Love You Too Much" from "The Book of Life"

Rounding out this weekend of sad love songs and Mexican culture, I decided to watch "Book of Life" with my son, because it's a cute movie and there are so few movies that feature the light side of Dia de Muertos. Whenever you see Dia de Muertos in adult movies, it's all about Santa Muerte and skulls and darkness, which sublimates the true meaning of the celebration. It's supposed to be happy - death is just the next phase of our journey and our loved ones are never really gone if they live on in our hearts. It's odd but Samhain and Dia de los Muertos - they're all about love, they just happen to focus on the dark parts we don't really like to deal with the rest of the year. The grief, the heartbreak when someone has passed away. And it's also about the hope - hope that we'll see them again, that they're in a good place, that they're watching us and proud of what we've become.

Moving on - this is probably one of my most favorite animated films. It's colorful - lots of bright greens and pinks and yellows, like you would see during a Dia de Muertos celebration. Of course it's going to be visually gorgeous - Guillermo del Toro is the director and, regardless of what you think of his work, he has a clear aesthetic vision that carries through all his movies. He's very similar to Wes Anderson and Christopher Nolan, in that way. Additionally, he cast a strong ensemble - Diego Luna (Manolo) and Channing Tatum (Joaquin) play two best friends in love with the same girl (Maria), played by Zoe Saldana. Hector Elizondo as Manolo's bullfighting father. Ron Perlman as Xibalba and Kate del Castillo as La Muerte. All fairly brilliant actors on their own but together, they brought the story to life. I also really liked that the characters were designed to resemble wooden dolls - if you see the beginning of the movie, you'd understand. Essentially, it's a story being told within a story and the narrator is using the dolls to re-enact events.

Finally, the film incorporates contemporary and original songs and, like many children's movies, music plays an integral part of telling the story. In "Book of Life," Manolo (the main protagonist) is a matador who wants to be a musician. He also thinks killing the bull after the fight is wrong (I agree), which is one of the many reasons why Maria loves him and not Joaquin. After the big bull fight in Maria's honor - where Manolo refuses to kill the bull and disgraces the Sanchez family - Manolo serenades Maria with "I Love You Too Much." It's a beautiful song and Diego Luna's voice makes me kind of want to die. Maybe it's the accent.

I love you too much

To live without you loving me back

I love you too much

Heaven's my witness and this is a fact

I know I belong

When I sing this song

There's love above love and it's ours

Cause I love you too much

After the song, Maria giggles and refuses to kiss Manolo, asking "You didn't think it would be that easy, did you?" But you know he had her heart before even began singing. Manolo makes a lot of grand gestures during the film but none of them are necessary. All a girl wants to know is that you're thinking of her, that you notice when she's gone, that you care about her opinion. And if she loves you, she accepts you for who you are and wants you to be you. This is the great lesson that Manolo has learn to escape the Land of the Forgotten and get his life back. That he's worthy of love - not just Maria's but his father's and his family's love as well - just the way he is, regardless of whether he is a bullfighter or a musician.

I'm telling you, I've got this love story formula all figured out now. I should start writing goddamn romance novels - I hear that business is pretty lucrative.

"I Love You Too Much" Clip

"Remember Me" from "Coco"

Today is Dia de los Muertos, which is celebrated by people of Mexican heritage as a way to honor the Dead and guide them on their spiritual journey. Celebrations usually start on Halloween and culminates on All Souls' Day (Nov 2), a Catholic day of remembrance for all the souls in Purgatory. Hopefully, that includes mine. Ever since I learned about Purgatory in catechism, I assumed that's where we already are. Just waiting to die, be judged, and sent to wherever we deserve to be - Heaven or Hell, anything is better than the waiting. It's funny, though, because I believe in reincarnation. It doesn't make sense when I think of it - if this is Purgatorio, why would I want to come back? I suppose I would if I had unfinished business, but I'm still hoping I can clear all that up in this lifetime.

I am of Mexican heritage but my family never really celebrated Dia de Muertos, not fully anyway. Not with Aztec Marigolds and calaveras. But my grandma does have her ofrenda, though we didn't know that's what it was when I was growing up. I just assumed she liked having pictures of her loved ones around. When Los Alamos caught on fire in 2011, my grandparents had to evacuate and they didn't have enough time to get her pictures down. Luckily, their house didn't catch fire but it was badly smoke damaged. When they were doing repairs on the house, you could see the outlines of the frames on the wallpaper. It was kind of ghostly, like a reminder of the memories she could've lost. I know they're just pictures, but they're all we have of our loved ones sometimes. Our minds can forget, but film is (almost) forever. And, while looking at a photograph, the memories come back like they were never gone - and with them, everything we felt during that time in our lives.

I watched "Coco" yesterday with my son. I think I was just looking for an acceptable excuse to cry. And cry I did because - damn it - that movie is so unexpectedly sad. When I first saw it in theaters, I was unprepared but I should've known better. When I was younger, I never used to cry at the movies. But I'm older now and a couple decades of heartbreak and disappointment have worked their terrible magic, I guess, and now...I can't help it. I have a good memory, too. I've always envied people with shitty memories - they are unburdened by the lyrics of a thousand songs and can watch movies based on books without focusing on every wrong detail. They say Cancers forgive, but never forget. I wonder if you can every truly forgive if you can't forget. I'm not sure you can. Anyway, I've been crying a lot lately but it's my own fault.

Remember me

Though I have to say goodbye

Remember me

Don't let it make you cry

For even if I'm far away, I hold you in my heart

I sing a secret song to you each night we are apart

Remember me

Though I have to travel far

Remember me

Each time you hear a sad guitar

Know that I'm with you the only way that I can be

Until you're in my arms again

Remember me

Today, we're supposed to celebrate our Honored Dead, so here's who I'm thinking about tonight. My Uncle Danny, who used to take me and my little sister to his softball games during the summer - I didn't get to go to his funeral and, even though it wasn't my fault, I still feel guilty. My Aunt LeAnn, who died around this time last year and was one of the most joyful people I've ever known. My Grandma Anna and Grandpa Rosario, who taught me to love opera and be proud of my Italian heritage. And, finally, my beloved puppy, Gwen, who was the best dog that ever lived and, without whom, I don't think I would've survived my teenage years. I'm going to wrap this up now, because my heart hurts. So much so, that I kind of wish I didn't have one.

I'm including two versions of the song. The lullaby, which will probably make you cry, and the modern version sung by Miguel, which includes the Spanish translation sung by Natalia Lafourcade. Happy November!

"Remember Me (Lullaby)"

"Remember Me (Miguel Version)"