"Wicked Little Town" by Hedwig and the Angry Inch

I've been thinking a lot, so if you'll indulge Philosophical Jess just one more time, let's go through the dark turns and noise of this wicked little town. I've been digging down the Google clickhole of woo and found myself in all sorts of murky nonsense - divine timing, detachment, Fate. I got stuck on the idea of detaching from the outcome, because that's kind of hard to do. How do you forget that you want something? Oddly enough, I found myself talking to a coworker about this today. She's Buddhist (or very into Buddhist philosophy - I can't tell which and I'm not going to outright ask her) and she was saying that, after practicing it for some time, it just comes naturally. I guess that's the point of all that meditation - to detach yourself from being so invested in one ideal life that you forget to live. I'm trying to take that to heart lately. No matter what happens, I'll be alright, so I just have to keep following the path before me. I've never had much faith but I feel like believing that is the closest thing to Truth I'll ever get.

I chose "Wicked Little Town" for today because that's just the sort of mindspace I get into when I start ruminating on this stuff. I always identified with Hedwig - she went with her heart and it took her on this whirlwind path. It changed her - physically and spiritually - but she was always herself. I think that's the big lesson from "Hedwig and the Angry Inch" - you'll go through hard times, people will come into and out of your life, but the one constant is you. Don't lose yourself.

You think that Luck

Has left you there

But maybe there's nothing

Up in the sky but air

And there's no mystical design

No cosmic lover preassigned

There's nothing you can find

That can not be found

Cos with all the changes

You've been through

It seems the stranger's always you

Alone again in some new

Wicked little town

"Wicked Little Town" is Hedwig's theme song, if you remember my rant on the structure of musicals. There's two versions, both of which are wonderful in their own way. When we're first introduced to "Wicked Little Town," Hedwig is doing a small-time gig at what looks to be a food court. She's performing with her band (comprised of foreign military wives, like herself) and she's telling her audience that it's going to be a big hit (but in kind of a sarcastic way). Towards the end of the song, she starts directing her singing to a boy hiding in the back. This, we later learn, will be the future Tommy Gnosis. Hedwig falls in love with Tommy but he leaves her and steals her songs to become a famous rockstar. The entire film is about Hedwig following the Tommy Gnosis tour to discredit him as a thief. In a way, she was right - "Wicked Little Town" does become a big hit....she's just not the one singing it. The ultimate lesson - be careful what you wish for.

I prefer the Tommy Gnosis version, which is the reprise. Another reminder - the reprise is usually when the main character realizes something about themselves and is empowered again. The realization for Hedwig was that she didn't need Tommy to be whole - she was whole completely on her own. This makes more sense when you hear the big ballad from the musical - "The Origin of Love" - which is brilliant and thus, is being saved for another day. Honestly, this movie is just fucking amazing and everyone needs to see it. Every song - as weird and trippy as the lyrics are - blows my mind every time I hear them. Now that I think of it, I'm really disappointed in myself that I don't own that movie. Excuse me while I go and rectify that situation.

"Wicked Little Town" Film Clip

"Wicked Little Town (Tommy Gnosis Version)"