As I've said before, this year has been something else. I won't call it bad, because it wasn't. But it was...different. I've never felt more delusional and crazy at times during 2019. And, yet, I've also felt freer and more myself than I have in the past 30 years of my life. I'm a lot closer to something akin to balance than I have ever been and for that, I am grateful. There was a period, earlier this year, when things were extra tough and all my efforts seemed so futile. Then, one morning, "Dream On" came on the radio....and it was the first time I had actually really heard the song. Mind you, I grew up on Aerosmith. They are part of my musical DNA, on par with the likes of Stevie Nicks, David Bowie, Queen, Cher, the Beatles, the Stones, the Doors, and Elton John. However, you can hear a song every single day and still not understand it. Then, all of a sudden, the lyrics take on this weight and meaning that they didn't have the day before. And you can't un-hear it, because it's in your soul now. That's basically what happened to me that day and I couldn't think of a better song to encapsulate my mentality going into 2020.
Every time when I look in the mirror
All these lines on my face getting clearer
The past is gone
It went by, like dusk to dawn
Isn't that the way
Everybody's got the dues in life to pay
I know nobody knows
Where it comes and where it goes
I know it's everybody sin
You got to lose to know how to win
"Dream On," much like "Carry On Wayward Son," captures a specific moment in the Hero's Journey that is absolutely essential in the creation of a legend and the plot of a story. It's the point where the Hero has wandered into the Abyss, unsure of how to get back. S/he has faced a crushing defeat and has to question everything s/he's believed up until that point. Every choice, every wrong turn, every decision made is called up for review. In many ways, it is the lowest point in the journey and what the Hero does next determines who they become. Assuming they choose to embrace their destiny (to be the Hero), that's when s/he realizes....there were no wrong turns, only lessons that helped them become the person they needed to be in that moment. To conquer the next challenge. To overcome the biggest obstacle in the Hero's Journey, which is always self-doubt and fear. It's when the fire returns and they go on to conquer these fears and redeem themselves for their past mistakes. After the Tower has collapsed, the Star comes out. Whether or not you choose to follow it is always your choice. And don't worry - there's plenty of Stars and it's never to late (or too early) to start following one.
I've been having a lot of weird dreams lately. Most recently, I had a dream that I had to fill up a pool with salt water using a wooden bucket. Even in the dream, it was understood that this was a lesson in character building. I mean, the pool did need to be filled for some reason but there was probably an easier way to do it. However, I knew intuitively that the point wasn't to get the water to the pool, it was to grow stronger and more patient in the process. I've been pondering this, as well as some thoughts I heard on a podcast regarding Jupiter in Capricorn. Jupiter is a benefic planet, meaning that - when it's well placed (as it was in 2019, when it was in Sagittarius, a sign it rules) - it lends an expansive, lucky energy to everything it influences. However, in Capricorn, Jupiter is in its Fall. Now, bear with me because I'm just now starting to understand the essential dignities of each planet, but what that means is that Jupiter's influence is severely handicapped. The luck is more in seeing the lesson for what it is, not that you'll get anything tangible out of the experiences you have. The astrologer went on to say that, in 2020, the skies are kind of against us. So if we want a happy ending, you have to be willing to work for it. There ain't no magical transits coming to save us in 2020. Fortune will favor those who are willing to dig in and create their own magic. Who can see the Abyss in front of them and are willing to walk into it anyway. Even if their compass is sorta broken and they traded their last candle to a traveling bard for a really cool looking grimoire. The way I've read the energy for 2020 - astrologically and empathically - is that we're all headed for a major course correction in some way. Regardless of how that plays out for each of us, what matters is who we choose to be every day. If you're not working to be who you want to be every single day, 2020 (and every year after) is going to fucking suck for you. And you'll have no one to blame but yourself.
However, if you are trying to embody your Destiny and your Highest Self - by trying to bring your thoughts, words, and deeds into alignment - I have just one message for you in the last moments of 2019....
Dream on, my dear Hero.
"Dream On" Video
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